Dealing with Setbacks
Today had been a productive day at work: I finished building the prototype for a financial services client, I attended the fortnightly project jam to learn about others’ key learnings, I had productive meetings for two client projects, I participated in the accelerator session with colleagues in Palo Alto, and I studied and found answers for my technical training questions.
I messaged a friend of mine in California at 4pm when I found out that he’s recently be laid off from work. At the end of day, I wrote a long response to him. The message wasn’t to share success tips, rather, I shared the story of my continuous setback over the past 2 years in London. This reflection reminded me that hardship are worthwhile — we long as we recognise the value and maximise the learnings.
“Job searching is very challenging — it doesn’t matter how good we are — because as we grow, we aim for new roles and want more. Sometimes we might even feel that what we are not getting are even things we are “over-qualified”, even if they are things we don’t really want. Over the past two years in London, when I was recruiting at London Business School, I’ve submitted over 100 applications. I was rejected most of the time. And even when I moved onto first round, second round, I was still rejected in the end. I started the recruiting process being very selective about the roles and the companies, but eventually I had to expand my options — yet I still didn’t get the opportunities that I wanted.
In the end though — I don’t regret having gone through the process — because I learned so much. I learned about the companies, the industries, the roles, but mostly — I learned about how to deal with rejection and setbacks, and how to really get up and believe things happen for a reason, and mostly I learned about “myself”. At the end, I had several options, that wouldn’t have been possible without having gone through the long process. What I am still learning now — is how to face my heart honestly and be clear on the choices I’ve made. And if there’s one thing I wished I have done better, it would be to manage my emotion throughout the process better. It’s not easy at all to stay positive all the time, but sometimes when we struggle, it’s definitely helpful to put ourselves on a longer-term and bigger perspective, to know that every little step will lead us towards the greater outcome, that we can’t take things for granted, and that “if things don’t suck, they aren’t worth it”.
I also find it really helpful to have close people to chat with — such as you, Duckie, my Mum. Not everyone will understand what we are going through all the time, but the true friends will understand you.
Don’t worry too much about the title/status (something I am also reminding myself), but it’s more about whether you find yourself waking up every day and live with a purpose — could be for your family, your happiness, your learning, your team, your goals… — then it’s all worthwhile.
– Your friend, Eva”
