10 questions we always wanted to ask him.

Do you ever wonder why he says that or why he thinks that, or even why the hell he does that? Well I interviewed three guys and asked them the questions we all want to know the answers to. Hope this can shed some light on your wandering mind so you can stop obsessing over what he is thinking. Here are the questions we asked them.

  1. Is sex really always on your mind?

Guy#1 No, usually I’m thinking about music.

Guy#2 I wouldn’t say it’s always on my mind. But I would say it’s something that is thought about/comes up a good portion of my day. When it’s not it’s either work related or sports.

Guy#3 Sex comes to my mind but not very often. In school I was always told that guys think about sex every 6 seconds, but I never seem to. When sex comes to my mind it’s definitely more in depth, and for someone whom I have a connection with. Not saying I don’t see a attractive woman and think she is good looking, but I don’t jump to my animal side and say I want to have sex with her. For me it really isn’t on my mind all the time only when I want it to be.

2. Do you get nervous when you have sex with someone the first time?

Guy#1 I would say usually, but it depends on how long I’ve known them.

Guy#2 Yes! Very much so. There is so much that goes into having sex with someone that I think questions on what she wants goes through my head more than focusing on the task at hand.

Guy#3 Not usually but there are the occasional times where I feel I may be pushing things too far. It’s not so much about nerves as it is, am I making her uncomfortable? I never want to make a girl uncomfortable so if I don’t know she is ready I tend to gauge her reaction to certain actions.

3. Where is your mind during sex? Is it focused on what her body looks like? Explain what you are thinking about.

Guy#1 My mind’s usually focused on the physical connection, not really able to pay detailed attention to the actual details regarding the way someone looks. So I guess in a way my minds somewhere else!

Guy#2 More on performance and what she wants. Some girls are more comfortable with some things than others. Especially when it comes to finishing. So that’s basically what’s going through my mind. It’s more of an anxiety of ruining the moment than being nervous about actually having sex.

Guy#3 Usually it’s focused on her and not just what she looks like. I’m usually focused on her sounds and her breathing as well. A girl can show a lot about how things feel to her especially through her face. Often when she is uncomfortable I can see it in her face. I want to make sure she is comfortable and having fun during sex because as the guy it’s not hard to make things fun and exciting for me so I really focus on things to make her feel good.

4. What is the most important physical attribute on a woman in your opinion?

Guy#1 Well I like to tell myself I don’t think like that, but hairstyles are something I notice I suppose.

Guy#2 Definitely her smile. Hands down.

Guy#3 Her eyes. To me a woman’s eyes tell everything. I know it may sound cliche but it’s what I look for. When we hangout, when we have sex and just when meeting a girl. Her eyes can tell you everything you want to know about how to make her happy.

5. Why do you think guys would rather ignore a girl then tell them they are just not interested?

Guy#1 I suppose it’s easier to pretend a situation doesn’t exist, than actually deal with repercussions that may come from starting a conversation like that.

Guy#2 Well I can’t speak for all guys, but for me it would be easier to not respond than to tell them I’m not interested because I don’t want to hurt feelings.

Guy#3 Guys want to avoid conflict especially with a girl. When a guy says he isn’t interested a girl may feel offended or unattractive and a guy doesn’t want to deal with emotions. He doesn’t want to have a big explanation planned out to tell a girl he doesn’t like something about her whether it’s physical, emotional or something like her personality. Avoiding things all together is often how guys solve problems even though it may just cause more.

6. Why do guys backslide? (Going back to an ex.)

Guy#1 Doesn’t everyone do that? I think it’s hard to leave behind a place we’re emotionally comfortable in, whether it was a healthy place or not.

Guy#2 My ex is my best friend. She knows me better than anyone else in the entire world. I think some guys go back due to the feeling that it’s safe and they know what they are getting into rather than starting something new with the potential to get hurt.

Guy#3 Talking to an ex is familiar. When guys break up they may feel confident that they will find some other girl that’s better only to find that isn’t the case. An ex is familiar territory, there’s almost no trying with an ex. You know what that person likes and what makes them happy so it takes stress out of the equation. It’s the ease and familiarity of someone that brings a guy back almost like always going to the same restaurant because you know the food is good.

7. Why do guys like the thrill of the chase?

Guy#1 It’s human nature to want what we don’t have I guess!

Guy#2 Hmmmm, that’s a tough question. I think it’s just entertaining. They want to try to get what they know is hard to get.

Guy#3 This is a harder question. Personally I don’t like the chase. To me it feels like the girl is trying to hide herself and be something she’s not, but I guess some guys like that. They want a girl to seem mysterious and hard to get. They want the thrill of getting something no other guy could. Unfortunately like any drug the effect wears off. The guy loses interest and goes back to the chase because it’s a challenge it’a not easy or simple.

8. What do you really mean when you say you have to much going on in your life for a relationship?

Guy#1 I mean I work a lot, during the day and at night, and after three years with someone thinking I could pull it off it turns out I’m just not all that cut out for a relationship at the moment.

Guy#2 I’ve never said that one day in my life, but I’d say that maybe it’s work related or traveling a lot.

Guy#3 This is often a cop out. This is like saying I have too much going on today to hangout. It’s a vague statement that’s open to interpretation, mainly the guys interpretation. A guy uses this when he doesn’t have the emotional connection and doesn’t really want one with a girl. Often the girl this is said to is the chase girl. The girl he wanted to take down, and to release himself from obligation he uses a vague statement. Although if the guy wants to be around the girl more this statement allows him to do that because he can always say well things are a little easier now so I can hangout more. This gives the girl that crack in the door that makes the guy seem like he does want a relationship, but as soon as he feels too constricted with her he uses his "get out of jail free" card and says things have gotten too busy again.

9. Why do you think the opinions of others affects how a guy feels about a girl?

Guy#1 I can’t speak for everyone, but it’s never changed my mind about anything.

Guy#2 I think there are a small amount of people who won’t be effected by talking, but overall I believe a larger number would be. Peers unfortunately dictate more than people think.

Guy#3 Others opinions can effect a guy and can also not affect a guy. If a guy feels he and a girl aren’t right for each other, others "opinions" help him end things more smoothly than manning up. Other times the legitimate opinions of others can make a guy think about a girl and himself. Guys often let friends dictate what they should and shouldn’t do. When it comes to a girls opinion it can make a guy feel self-conscious about his decisions with a particular girl. If his friends or family don’t like a girl they can influence break ups by saying things like "You two aren’t right together", "You can do better" or "I thought you were better than that" on the other hand opinions can keep unstable couples together by filling the guys head with positive opinions.

10. Do you look past the emotional connection if you have a really good physical connection?

Guy#1 Yes, but that only works for a short time.

Guy#2 For me I have to have an emotional connection before I can have a physical connection. So if there isn’t a emotional connection the physical aspect wouldn’t happen.

Guy#3 Not really. I really look for a emotional connection something that grounds me to the other person. The physical can be great, but it’s only temporary so i look for the common ground and for the emotional connection that will make me want to stay around the other person.

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