“Uni will be the best days of your life”
And for many people it will be and I’m so happy for them, for me it was a little different. This time last year I was moment away from taking my own life.
Last September I started uni and last November if it wasn’t for one of my flat mates I may not have been able to write this post. Finally starting university aged 21 I thought I was entering the best years of my life, moving to Birmingham I met some of the best people I’ve ever known and we all lived in the same halls, what could be better?
It started how it does for everyone with freshers which included a lot of drinking, making friends and distracting yourself from feeling homesick- and I was having the BEST time met so many great people and made some great memories but within a few months my mental health went plummeting down I was left unable to get out of bed or shower, some days I was able to get up to open my bedroom door so talk to my flat mates but others I’d just lay there in my dark room.
The course has really taken its toll on me and my health which was the scariest thought because I came to study Makeup Artistry. Makeup helped me through so much and if this didn’t go to plan what would I do? Studying SFX and looking at real wounds was more triggering that I could imagine so much so I stopped attending lectures all together but what would my family think? Dropping out within a couple months, did she try hard enough? Was it first term nerves?
After being brutally honest with my mum she was even more supportive than I could’ve asked her to be. Moving my stuff home and saying bye to my friends I cried even more than when my mum dropped me off in September but this was best for my health.
Fast forward a year I’m still here feeling better than ever- I’ve moved in with my boyfriend to a new city and am now working my dream job! It’s now more scary for me to think I might not have been here today than how scary it seemed to just keep going.
I am so grateful for all the support from my family, Joe and my friends I made at uni. I’m that kid that dropped out but I’m still here to tell the story.