You Will Get Your Arse Kicked
If you are not in the arena getting your arse kicked then I am NOT interested in your feedback — Brene Brown. If you are not familiar with Brene Browns work then I highly recommend you take the time to check her out. Her first Ted Talk video went viral and she is now in high demand in Fortune 500 companies around the world, taking the message of Vulnerability and Shame into Corporate Establishments.
Her recent video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8-JXOnFOXQk entitled ‘Why The Critics Aren’t The Ones Who Count’, is a must watch for every leader. Leadership is the domain of ‘confrontation’. The more comfortable you get with embracing the nuances of confrontation in your leadership position rather than resisting it, the more you will evolve in your leadership capability.
I know what it takes to not only show up in the arena. I also know what it takes to SUSTAIN showing up in the arena AND in my vocation I teach others to do whatever they need to do to get into the arena. So in light of this, 3 themes resonated for me in my own leadership experience from watching this presentation.
(1) One thing you can be guaranteed if you show up in the arena, you will get your arse kicked
Expect to get your arse kicked, its part of being in the arena. Confrontation/Resistance and Uncomfortability are the three emotions most human beings avoid but if change/transformation is your game you need to go looking to form a new relationship with these three emotions for they are the corner stone to experiencing true transformation!
But what I’ve learnt is this: If you are not in the arena getting your arse kicked I am not interested in your feedback, period.
Sometimes in leadership we have a tendency to be impacted by what others think. What I love about what Brene states above, given what it takes to be in the arena, only listen to those who knows what it takes to be in the arena, for they are getting their arse kicked too, you might be able to find some common ground, if they are not, their feedback is not of value, period!
(2) We lose our connection when we are defined by what people think!
In leadership connection is primary, it may not be something that is commonly discussed in the ranks of traditional leadership teachings but it is THE single most important aspect of being empowered as a leader. Connected to your message, connected to your people, connected to your vision, connected to doing what it takes every day, connected to your beliefs, your values, your purpose, connected to your own source, connected to achieving the best for yourself and your people, and the list goes on…never lose your connection by being pre-occupied by what others think!
(3) So to the critics, I see you, I hear you, but I am going to show up anyway
Just LOVE this…it takes something to be a leader but it takes something even more to sustain showing up as a leader in the face of adversity. The more adversity you experience the more powerful you will be in your leadership capability for you of all people know what it takes to stay the distance. Embrace the internal and external critic’s, use them as your allies, not your enemy!
Take 20 minutes out of your day and listen to Brene Brown’s presentation….it will make a difference for you today.