My Boyfriend Just Left Me but I Still Love Him — My Boyfriend Just Up And Left Me
One thing you never want to hear yourself saying is “my boyfriend just left me.” Being dumped is a humbling experience. For many of us it comes at a time when we thought our relationship was in a good place. For others there’s some conflict leading up to it but it still does feel like a dagger through the heart when he says those words to you. You’ve got two choices in a situation like this. You can wallow in your own self pity and continue to feel sorry for yourself or you can get the man back. Don’t ever lose sight of the fact that he loved you once. That means he can love you again and there are proven ways to make that happen. You just have to follow the rules.
If your boyfriend just left you, rejection is the main emotion coursing through your body. It’s powerful and it’s weakening. When the man you love most in the world rejects you, your self worth plummets. You start to question everything about yourself including your personality and the way you look. Stop that. You’re more than good enough and right now your boyfriend just can’t see it. You’re going to change that and make yourself irresistible to him again.
Most women think that in order to get back a boyfriend they have to focus all their energy and attention on him. That’s completely wrong. You are your main focus from this moment forward. After all, you’re the woman he’s going to want again, before long. So your short term goal is to change whatever you might have done during the relationship that drove him to break up with you. Be honest with yourself. Don’t try and hide behind the ideal that you were perfect. You’re not. Take stock of what he didn’t find appealing and then change those things.
The next way to win back his love is to show him that you’re still dynamic, desirable and completely confident in yourself. Your mission here is to get out and start living your life again. Even though you may think your ex doesn’t care what you’re doing, he does. He’s likely been asking mutual friends how you are. If he hears that you and a big old tub of ice cream have been hanging out every night in front of the television, he’ll stop asking and stop being interested. On the other hand, if he hears that you look amazing and are hitting all the local night spots with friends, he’s going to feel a little pang of jealousy.
Your ex boyfriend expects and wants you to be devastated by the fact that he dumped you. If you’re not he’ll question how much he really did mean to you. Once that happens, there’s no stopping him because when a man thinks he can’t have a woman, she’s all he wants.
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My boyfriend just left me but I still love him — My boyfriend just up and left me.
Your boyfriend has just dropped the bomb and broken up with you and you would do just about anything to get him back. Seemingly out of nowhere, he announces to you that he is done and your relationship is over. You sit in disbelief wondering how things got this bad and if you have a chance to get him back. Your day are like torture and your nights are sleepless as you search for a solution to your problem of how to win him back. You awake every morning hoping and praying that all of this was just a bad dream but as your head clears you realize that this is the reality. He really has broken up with you and now it seems like it’s your job to figure out what went wrong and try to fix it.
The problem is that no matter what you try to do or say your ex boyfriend isn’t having it. Anything you say or do gets turned around and you just wind up having to explain yourself and things only seem to be getting worse and worse. You tell him that you love him and he tells you that you don’t. You beg him for another chance and he sees no reason why and stands on his decision to end the relationship. It’s as if you’re dealing with a completely different person than the one you fell in love with. It is as if his heart has turned to stone.
As painful as your breakup is I encourage you to do your best to rebuild your relationship and work towards your goal of getting him back. If you tire of the constant roller coaster ride that you are bound to be on, dig deep and find a little more strength to go on when times get tough and you feel like quitting. If another woman arrives on the scene, do your best to resist the urge to lash out and confront her or both of them. Swallow the pain and live in the knowledge that with a little understanding and some persistence you really can get your ex boyfriend back if you understand what it takes to make him fall in love with you again.
Live in the confidence that your boyfriend really does love you. He fell in love with you and it is my firm belief that he does still have love for you buried deep down within himself but it is your job to unearth that love. And what is going to unearth that love? Well, chances are what you’ve been doing lately, if you are typical, isn’t going to be winning you any points when it comes to getting him back, first of all. If you have been spending a lot of time trying to convince him to come back to you or that he really does still love you in spite of what he is saying, you are only coming off as needy, desperate and possibly a little bit crazy.
Any attempts to convince him that he has made a mistake by breaking up with you are only going to be met with the utmost resistance. He is going to stick to his guns and argue with you which is only going to make things worse. I know… people say all the time that the best thing to do is to talk through your problems but do you see where this usually gets you? It just tends to make things worse. Avoid saying the words “I love you” or “I still love you” also since this is the epitome of desperation. A person doesn’t love someone who treats them poorly and by doing so you only lower your self worth in his eyes. Hold your words in and save them for a day when they will be said as a response to his declaration of love. How sweet will that be? And if you doubt me I am here to tell you that indeed it will happen if you play your cards right and regain your composure and self esteem.
So how do we get started? My first recommendation is to give him a little time and space and take advantage of this time and space to get yourself pulled back together. Let the emotions cool down for a bit and give him some time to actually start missing you for once. If you have been a continued daily fixture in his life he has little chance to actually start to miss you and let the reality of this breakup fully sink in. Guaranteed that there will be times when he will wonder about you, what you’re doing and ponder reaching out to you in moments of weakness. If this does happen though, resist the temptation to answer that phone and start back with the “I love you’s”. You could undo everything that you have done just by letting him sit and think for a while.
Now, I want you to think about something. What is the most painful part of your breakup? What causes you the most pain? Is it the thought that he might actually move on and begin dating another woman? Is it the thought that he never even really loved you? Is it his callousness to your feelings and emotions and pleas for mercy as he destroyed your heart with his unfeeling comments and jabs when he broke up with you? Now, how would it feel to be able to turn the tables on him and have him feel the same torturous pain that you have been feeling from this breakup? How would it feel to have him come crawling back to you begging you for a second chance. This is typically what works best and the most powerful way of getting your ex boyfriend back.
No amount of logic or convincing that you really do love him is going to give you the change of heart that you are looking for. No amount of assurance that you love him in a way that no other woman ever will is going to get him to change his mind. Hours and hours of talking about your problems and promises to change aren’t going to bring him crawling back to you proclaiming his love for you no matter what so called professionals might say. He is only going to come back once it is more painful for him to be away from you and once he changes his mind all on his own that you are the woman that he wants. This is the only long term solution that has been proven to work time and time again.
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