Should I Call My Ex Boyfriend If He Broke Up With Me — He Broke Up With Me Should I Contact Him

Kelly Lacey
6 min readAug 21, 2021
Photo by Andy Art on Unsplash

If you’re thinking — should I call my ex? Then chances are your past relationship is still weighing heavily on your mind, and you’re still finding yourself thinking about your ex partner. Don’t worry if this is the case, or if you’re in a very confusing place in your life right now. It has been shown that the end of a relationship is one of the most traumatic things for a person to go through — the shock that is part of this process makes a lot of things difficult to cope with.

So Let’s Get Some Clarity!

Often, the real question behind the thought ‘should I call my ex’, is not whether or not you should actually phone them, it’s more — what do you actually say to them when you get them on the phone?

Do you have a plan? A list of topics you’d like to discuss? Because believe me, in my experience simply ‘winging it’ in a situation like this is never enough. One simple mistake or ‘innocent blunder’ could mean the difference between getting the answers you’re looking for, and your ex not speaking to you again.

A Question of Timing

You need to resist the temptation to call too soon. There are lots of reasons for this. Depending on how much drama was generated by your break up, you need to allow time for things to calm down and the dust to settle. It is no good trying to patch things up with your ex while they are still mad at you. You also need time to gain control of yourself and your emotions, as it is essential that you do not try to contact your ex while you are still feeling upset. Make sure you have made a genuine effort to understand what went wrong, rather than simply blaming your ex (or yourself) for everything.

How Do You See the Future?

We know you want your ex back. But you must have something more effective in place to succeed rather than just a burning desire to get back together. It will be fruitless if you just make the future a repetition of the past. That is why you need to understand what went wrong, so that you can also think about how you might behave in future in order to create a more successful relationship.

What Do I Say If I Decide To Call My Ex?

Now, this part is important! You need to realise that however the situation was at the end of your relationship — that right now your ex partner will be feeling, to say the least, a bit tense about the possibility of talking to you, even on the phone!

For this reason, for the call to go well you need to make sure you avoid certain subjects and focus on others.

Why do I mean by this?

Well, picture this scene from your ex-partner’s point of view:

Your ex is quietly eating their lunch, or relaxing after work, and the phone rings… they look at the caller ID and they see… gasp! Your name!? Straight away they’re on on the back foot — having been taken by surprise from your phone call.

In spite of this however, they shrug off the risk and answer the phone. You may have been feeling confused about the relationship for several days, weeks, or even longer! You have a list of questions that you want to ask your ex, so you start rattling through them on the phone call. Questions about the breakup, wondering if they still think about you, asking them if they’re seeing anyone new… and the thoughts and questions go on and on.

Now this is the wrong way to make contact with your ex partner again. Do you think that your ex would ever answer the phone to you again? Or would they simply remember this awkward, question filled conversation and quietly switch off the phone?

I think you know what most people would do there.

Have a Plan of Action

Should I call my ex boyfriend if he broke up with me: He broke up with me should I contact him?

If you blow it during your first attempt to contact your ex, you may not get another chance. Don’t just call and hope for the best. Think carefully beforehand about what you want to achieve by your call. Keep your ambitions realistic (don’t expect everything to be moonlight and roses straight away) and decide the best way to make them happen. When you are under the pressure of actually talking to your ex, it will be hard to think on the run, so make notes beforehand. Decide what you need to say to get through to them, and practise your lines before you call. Be ready with a good opening line, as you don’t want your ex to slam the phone down before you have a chance to get started. Anticipate a rough ride and have some persuasive arguments ready for why your ex should be willing to listen to you.

Be Reasonable

When should I call my ex?

Don’t even attempt it unless you have a positive outlook and are prepared to show patience. Your best tactic is to disarm any potential hostility by agreeing with the break up. This will make your ex feel less defensive, and show that you are not about to go over old and painful ground. Your aim is to look to the future, and make it clear that you want any interaction between you to be easy and pleasant. You need to sound confident and positive, so practise first and make sure your mood is upbeat when you call.

Be Patient

Don’t expect one phone call to change everything. It takes time to fix a relationship, just as it took time to build it in the beginning. If you can build a rapport with your ex, you will have succeeded in the most difficult step. Go slowly and keep your mind on how different things are going to be this time. Be ready to show your ex how much better things can be in the future. Allow for the fact that they may need a lot of convincing!

Should I Call My Ex? How to Answer Your Question

Be clear in your mind about what you are doing before you take any action. Impulsive or reckless behaviour could blow your chances for good. Unless you feel very confident of your ability not to mess up, you would be very wise to get some more detailed advice before doing anything potentially fatal. To save your relationship is your number one priority here, so don’t try to cut corners and find yourself shut out for good.

Pay Close Attention Here-

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Now you can stop your break up or lover’s rejection…even if your situation seems hopeless! There are specific techniques that will show you exactly what to do and what to say to get your ex lover back in your arms- Especially if you are the only one trying… Visit Ex Back Secrets

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