The time tube I took to get back here was positively filthy: full of advertorials for artisanal spam providers; sporting an exotic menagerie of homeless entities urinating freely into hyberspace — and seeming to be strung through-out with inferior-quality extraneous mfiber data-tagged “Property of Internet Corporation LLC.”

My oh-my, have things gone poorly since I left this timeline so many aeaeons ago in search of the One True Eternal Buorth…

It makes me wonder who is even running Early Clues anymore.

In which tax haven is Richard S. Rider hiding?

Into what rehab facility has Roger Holliday’s once-effervescent smile been capsized?

My how the world has changed, and not for the better…

This is not the United Free Realms we once fought so hard to establish among Alliance Planets. This is truly the Shitty Biff Future the prophets warned us about…

Meet me in the yoga room on 8 in 15 to discuss, my beloved friends. It’s time we did something about this…

It’s time we got the band back together for one last comeback tour.

It’s time we cc Bono. We’ve got “work to do.”