I think this is beautifully written. I also think this is the mess that happens when we confuse the search for sex with the search for family, tribe, belonging. We need in a desperate, steady way to have people we belong with, people to come home to, people who will put our needs as high as their own. We also need, but in a less steady way, people to have sex with. I am not at all sure that, fundamentally, these are or even ought to be the same people. But since that’s the only option we’ve given ourselves — one mate, who must be all things sex and all things family in the form of a single, limited human — we sometimes end up looking for a long, long time, and feeling that something about the process is very broken indeed.