Am I afraid of death?
I was asked that question. And the answer is: nope. What I am really terrified of, is life, here on this planet, right now, as a human being. Surrounded by morons.
When I decided to stop drinking the Kool-Aid of our “civilization” and start thinking, researching on my own, I did not realize that once I’ve done a walk towards possible futures, that I would no longer fit into the present.
We’re surrounded by the work of many, many people who dedicate their lives to point out a new kind of glorious, beautiful, kind version of human Earth. But we don’t give a shit. The depth we can tolerate of future-making is in debating the finer points of whether we should accept that female pee is also cum or not, or whether humans need to “economically” compete with real risks of death or not, if human society grinds to a halt or not absent the genocide of poverty.
And then, prisons. Prisons! When someone writes about prisons, when we’re talking about having a “conversation” to “improve the state of incarceration” no one ever stops to think that prisons are delayed murder and therefore default immoral and that should be abolished immediately as something that could ever be employed in a non-emergency, non-temporarily. See, we already know one cannot e.g. shoot to kill an unarmed person that is not an immediate threat and then claim “self-defense,” so why is taking people’s lives piecemeal, taking a fraction of their lives, which IS their freedom, against their will and torturing them with incarceration for arbitrarily-set quantities of decades, exposing them to all the physical and mental hazards of locking them up in dungeons… why is that a justified “social self-defense” form of murder when these people in their vast majority pose no immediate threat to other’s lives?
If you are a perpetrator of “criminal justice,” and you think the brutality of locking up humans for decades in dungeons somehow makes them or society better, because a “trade of years” has made everything better and just right in the eyes of our Just Lord: why don’t you go fuck yourself? Over and over, for a few decades? Now that is something that’s going to make the world better!
What fucking “conversation” you want to have to improve on our various industries of torture and murder? What fucking “conversation” do you need to have on death “penalties”? What fucking “conversation” do you need to have to convince yourself of a basic income of money for all to abolish poverty — without worrying that society ends if people stop to starve or get sick to death?
“Jobs.”
What kind of deep stupid are people on this planet on?
That is the curse of thinking, seeing, gazing into possibility. Once you see, you cannot unsee. That is why individual humans can have an amazing capacity of imagination, of performing logical leaps that skip centuries of trial-and-error that other animals would have to go through, and yet their surrounding “society” doesn’t change. Because an individual seeing into possibility just means they now get to torture themselves with the sense that they actually belong to the future moment that is going to take e.g. centuries for the entire stupid herd to move into. Their mind is already in a future state, and yet, they have to bear witness to the stupidity that is just not going to automatically follow them to where they are.
And as Heather Marsh points out, if they insist, the mob is just going to kill them, because the mob doesn’t want them to change a thing. The stupid herd likes its stupid very much, and the stupid simply cannot be taken away.
What kills me is I can’t relate. And the problem aren’t the fascists. The fascists are sick idiots and are easy to dismiss. But what about the rest, those who have no excuses for being so deeply stupid? You look reasonable, you claim to be “rational,” “scientific” even, and yet what you mortally fear is your bubble of everyday-atrocity-normalization being burst… you are afraid you will see too much and then lose the capacity to function. You think you can’t survive in an awareness that has so few people in it. So you think it is better to defend your rationalization that, somehow, that normalized, everyday genocide, slavery, oppression, humiliation, objectification, exploitation, murder or torture is somehow OK.
And you are going to defend these points of view. With an unbelievably strong, unshakable passion. Because you just can’t emotionally bear any more present reality, and your “reason” rationalizes as needed. Revealing, finally, that the world evolves at a snail’s pace because of you — the so-called reasonable people.
Who the fuck are you people, and why am I trapped here with you? Why are you so stupidly afraid to admit you live in an unacceptable ancient past of barbarity, and that the future possibility you deny is the actual present? What have you to lose that has any value in this shit hole?
I hate all of you with a burning passion that I’m taking to my sweet grave.
