[Updated] 20 things you need to know before your next birthday

Akapo Damilola
Jul 20, 2017 · 3 min read

Update: Well, I got accosted by some angry “over 20" people. Feared for my puny life, so I updated the title. Oh well, same rules apply! but there’s an addendum with just one very important entry. So check out number 21.

  1. Everyone dies. It’s the natural order of things. You’ll die, your dog will die, your favorite actor would die etc etc.
  2. You’ll fuck up once in awhile. It’s ok. It’s ok. It’s ok. What matters is the lesson and how you fix your screw ups.
  3. Ordering your priorities don’t necessarily make you better than others. It would make you feel better about yourself though. I call it the “Do I have two heads” feel good effect.
  4. Ignore fads. They pass. You might still be alive when they pass. Blackberry phone users once felt like Kings and Queens. Today, it’s the iPhone users.
  5. There’s a chance you might not wake up tomorrow. Still, don’t let the paranoia get to you.
  6. Make plans. Vet them. Make other plans. Always have a fallback but don’t go beyond Plan “S” if you’re unsure and when they fail, giggle awkwardly and go watch TV.
  7. You don’t have to react every time. Sometimes, just lie down and laugh or stare or dance.
  8. Money is important and also ephemeral, often when people tell you “money isn’t important”, they usually forget to finish up with “but be sure as hell to have it!”. Whatever you do, build as many tangible relationships as possible.
  9. You’ll probably not be a multi-billionaire. Being a millionaire is ok too. A wise man once said, “I have 99 problems but my bank akant ain’t one”.
  10. Avoid romantic relationships for a while if you are not the trusting type. It’s good for your heart and general well being. Really, avoid that stuff. Don’t say I never did nothing for yah.
  11. Have addictions. Just one at a time. Have them sequentially.
  12. Avoid talking about work except you really have to. Work is work, your personal life needs some loving too.
  13. Paint a picture of how you want people to see you, also have a hidden painting of what you truly are.
  14. Deep breaths can help you keep sane when going through an emotional turmoil.
  15. Laugh at everything, you’re less likely to go mad that way.
  16. Don’t take advice from anyone who hasn’t done what you need advice on. Even if they have, cherry pick.
  17. No one has life all figured out but some people definitely have two heads and that’s why they seem better than you.
  18. Build a habit of fixing your problems. You’ll always be at fault for any misfortune that happens to you, blaming others won’t fix anything.
  19. Trust no one 100%, not even yourself. You know how many scum thoughts run through your mind daily? No one is perfect, prepare for eventualities.
  20. This is a shitty list. Any list of “what to do or not do” when life is concerned most often than not is shitty. Just live, be good and trust your instincts and always have an escape plan.

21. Whatever you do, be happy.

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