When was the last time you had a real conversation? Have a minute to think about it, a real conversation in which you felt to be part of it. The last time when the conversation you had with someone was meaningful?
Such rare occasions right?
It is sad and very tragic to know that real conversations now days have been replaced with endless talks, endless chats, using cellphones to go into social media conversations, TV chat shows that do not give you the chance to pause and listen to one another.
In a room full of people if you just move two steps back you will see a bunch of people doing the same thing, spending their time between talking thinking about what to say next. You can easily understand that no one of them is open to persuasion, no one is open to listen that maybe something is interesting in what others have to share while communicating and maybe that can change any point of view, that maybe that conversation makes sense and we didn’t know it before.
People usually hesitate to listen so in this way they can choose exactly what they want to tell or express, they start timing the conversation that is in the other person’s part so they can find in their mind the subject of which they want to talk for because only then they are focused to the conversation, they are waiting there for you to just stop talking so they can continue with their ideas.
This is a bad habit that we do without knowing, we often forget that a conversation is much more important than it seems to be. Its value is much more important than typing what we can say out loud, and we do know that there are people that they express themselves better in writing than in talking but having a real conversation is that much powerful that people sometimes don’t even know, or they have already forgotten about it.
Once we get involved into a real conversation it gets awkward, just because we don’t do it very often, therefore, we forget that it is okay to leave pauses between a conversation, sometimes we go on by filling them with words that don’t even make sense, such as “um”, “ ëm”, or even worse we go on by saying something that is not necessary, forgetting that it is okay that during a conversation there can be empty spaces, there can be silent parts and it is fine. Do not speak because you feel like you have to fill in the space that went to be silent, speak only when you feel like you have something great to share with whom you’re talking to.
Sometimes we find ourselves into a point that we don’t want to sound boring to the partner, or pathetic, or nonsense and so we are afraid to express ourselves. It is important to remember that a conversation is made by two or more people, you do not have to always dominate the conversation.
Now, take two steps forward into that room and try to get connected.
Listen to that person that is rethinking his next words and afterward make him listen, make him believe in the power of the conversation.
Turn off everything that takes you away from a real conversation.
Feel the pressure of words that are being told to you or coming out from you, leave spaces for persuasion, don’t fill in the silent parts of a conversation you do not have to.
Feel the power that makes us present into this world not just walk through it.
