August 2016. Week 3.
This is a diary entry because something profound just happened. But it has cumulatively become this conscience that has been lurking around my mind until 5 minutes ago.
Flashback to a couple days ago when I’m starting to dislike everybody. And I mean everyone. I seem to point out the worst at people and seems to hate them more then than ever before. Even nice people looked so low in my eyes this particular day. I called a person “a witch” for the first time in months, but this time I actually meant it.
I started developing the worst assumption roller coaster for my loved ones. Granted, I did have a situation that probably made this possible, but it wasn’t even one. It was ALL of them. And considering the fact that my best friend passed away, that day was sanctioned along with much regret.
So I started going to happy places, doing happy things. I was mannered, but I wasn’t fine.
I forgot how I feel the rest of the time.
I woke up today being the bitchest I could ever be, but I was productive. I then unprecedentedly started crying for no reason. I tried going out and just tears falling down my face for no reason.
And this might be dumb, but tell me: is that depression?
Pardon my ignorance, but I really want to know if that is it. I know that depression has somewhat of a stretch? But I want to know if the indications falls in whatever spectrum is available in mental illness research.
Anyway, I’m fine now. Ordered some caffein but perhaps will order a nutella something something.