What is Trust? (part 1)
Hello reader :) At the end of 2015 I decided to write a book on Trust and by the start of 2016 I had finished and uploaded it onto Amazon. I had plans of promoting and pushing the book but, if I’m honest to myself, I was actually scared that people would actually read the book and, through this book, give a glimpse of who I truly was so I distracted myself with “more important things to do”.
With a year now gone, I’ve finally decided to Trust and simply publish the whole book on Medium.
The book is best understood when read in order since the book builds on top of concepts and definitions used in earlier chapters. So if you’re jumping in the middle, I’d recommend going and starting from the start so there is no confusion. As well, there are activities so that you can explore not only the intellectual side of Trust but the emotional side as well. Like confidence, it only becomes real if you feel it inside you.
Enjoy!
The Concept of Trust
Trust plays such a crucial role in our lives yet, for most of us, we know very little about it.
It determines the level of intimacy in our romantic relationships that we have, how close we feel with our parents, family and friends and whether we feel we are able to thrive in Life or just survive it.
It determines how easily we can make friends, our confidence in doing things and our willingness to Dare to pursue our dreams.
Trust is one of the main colors we use to paint our reality and, ultimately, how Happy we are in that reality we create. But rarely do we think deeply about Trust or wonder whether the reason why things Are NOT As They Should Be is because of our misconception of Trust.
In the first section of this book, The Concept of Trust, we will simplify and strip out all the complexities of Trust, Mistrust, and Not Trust so that we can easily understand and feel what is happening inside of us when we are feeling these emotions.
We will also demonstrate the difference between Mistrust and Not Trust and what we simply need to do when we are Mistrusting someone or something.
Finally, we will take a look at Trustworthiness and what it means when we are trying to earn someones Trust.
Trust
Activity 1: Take out your journal and a countdown clock. Give yourself a countdown time of one minute. When you are ready, start the clock and write down the answer to this question — What is Trust?
Now you have learned something about yourself. Whether you did not have enough time to write anything down, wrote some things down and scribbled some things out, or you confidently wrote your answer. You now have a clear and personal understanding of what you believe Trust is and the confidence level in which you believe in your answer.
Now let us take a look at the definition of Trust from merriam-webster.com:
noun: belief that someone or something is reliable, good, honest, effective, etc
verb: to believe that someone or something is reliable, good, honest, effective, etc
And some of their example sentences using Trust:
Trust as a noun:
Our relationship is founded on mutual love and Trust
His lies and deception shattered my Trust in him
She has no Trust in the security of online banking
Trust as a verb:
Working together is going to be difficult if you don’t Trust each other.
I should have never Trusted him.
“Are you sure this will work?” “Trust me. I know what I’m doing.”
There are two observations we can make about Trust.
First, Trust is a relationship between us and someone or something, and this applies even when we say that we Trust ourselves. It is a relationship between us (the part making the Choice to Trust) and our intuition, gut instincts, feelings, thoughts, ideas, etc.
Next is that Trust is a relationship of dependency. For example, when we Trust a friend we are depending on that friend to give honest advice, to keep our secrets, to cover our back, etc. Trusting someone or something implies that we are Choosing to have a relationship of dependency to that person or thing.
But how is this relationship being created? Trust is a relationship that is created purely by us and no one else. It is a one-way bridge we Choose to construct with someone or something and it cannot be bought, bartered for, demanded or forced by the person or thing we are creating this relationship with.
It is 100% our Choice, on whether we Trust or Not Trust someone or something and it is our Responsibility in maintaining, expanding, narrowing, opening, closing or destroying this bridge of Trust that we Chose to create.
Activity 2: In your journal, make a list of ten things that you Trust. Next to each item on that list put at least one thing you are depending on from that person or thing.
This activity puts your consciousness on why you choose to Trust something or someone.
