Writing Ourselves Right Out of Chaos
Jennifer Killgore and tribe, the fact that you can relate to my stories, that they resonate, means more then I can describe with words. The feeling is BIG!
I`my not sure why I didn’t respond to this earlier. Maybe because there was too much truth, love, honesty, and pure emotion that flowed…medium.com
Exactly two months ago I was feeling desperate, lost, confused, and “why me?” I didn’t want this. I didn’t want to be in this situation. Why the fuck did this happen? How did this sneak up on me? Why wasn’t I in control? The stigma. The sadness. The grief.
The choice was right in front of me. Build up my tolerance more. Spend more money. Fall down the rabbit hole. Then what? Well it’s the “gateway drug” right? Walk through that gateway to hell?
Or, Stop. Walk. Not question why. Not look back. Just walk. Did I believe? Hell no I didn’t. Im confident as fuck with myself and my world. But not this. So no, I didn’t believe I could do it. But I did believe there was a reason this was happening. So, I keep walking into the unknown, tapering all the way. As promised it turns out is IS beautiful on the other side. There are moments. But less and less moments. I am told it just gets better and better. I know and believe now. ❤️ #clear
I try to inspire struggling women that they CAN get out of bad situations like a marriage that blows up, on my Facecrack and Instacrack. They can emerge, I know I did it.
I thought, If I write about my situation now, it will make it real, hold me accountable, and maybe touch one other life if I’m open about my situation, and a safe place to do that would be Medium. So reading your powerful words this morning is a mega affirmation that my inner teacher guided me the right way, to write the way. What’s in the way, is the way.
I’m on my knees grateful I kept walking and will keep walking. I trust the universe and my path more then ever now.
I’m currently receiving Holly Glenn Whitaker 40 day Mantra’s from Hipsobriety.com. I’m finding it very helpful. I’m living the daily lessons from Eckhart Tolle and Kim Eng. I am their shepard. I have so much more to write and share about all of this. I will keep writing, I will keep walking. And thank you universe that you Jennifer Killgore are doing the same as you lift us readers up too!
I know you “know” the other side is beautiful. I know you “get” that she is powerful and calling your name all that time. I know you “understand” that she is hell, she is a sexi bitch, and that she will turn her back on you and leave you to rot. And I want you to “believe” that you will let go of her forever and let the beauty of the world fill your awareness and presence again.
It was so fitting so have this poem appear today — it spoke to me. Its exactly why I started to write. Thank you Tasneem Kagalwalla.