Five Things I Learned From Being Part Of A Band
I’ve always wanted to be part of a band.
Last week I had the privilege of being part of a particular band you may have never heard of. In this band we don’t collect royalties, sign autographs, nor perform in large arenas; Playing an instrument is not a pre-requisite. As a matter of fact, there are no pre-requisites to join. In this band, there is no A&R telling us who’s in and who’s out; We value inclusivity and hospitality.
We care less about making ‘Top 40', and more about making an impact. Our ratings aren’t gauged by listeners, but by the number of miles driven and risks taken.
This particular band I’m talking about is called The Wayfaring Band; A band of people who travel together. The Wayfaring Band is an organization that organizes and runs social programs and road trips to young adults who experience special needs. Read more about them here.
Last week, we all hopped on our tour bus (a giant blue school bus) and made our way from Denver up to the Badlands in South Dakota and back in seven days. We picked strawberries, visited the Oregon Trail, marveled at Mount Rushmore and the amazing Badlands, and even did a bit of square dancing. I will never forget all the people I’ve met on this trip and all the lessons learned. Here are just a few…
- Don’t be afraid to show your love and appreciation.
Over the course of a week, I’ve received hundreds of hugs and seen the types of friendships you never knew existed. Most of the band members had no problem showing their affection and saying hi to random strangers. For some of them, that filter doesn’t exist- they see nothing ‘wrong’ with it. Of course, there isn’t anything wrong with it.
There’s a side of us that most of us don’t show because we’re too afraid what other’s might think and it’s a shame because there’s so much of us to be had. Which leads me to my next lesson learned… - The sooner you experience discomfort, the sooner you get over it.
I can’t tell you how many times I felt completely uncomfortable during this trip. It’s hard to explain, but at the beginning of the trip I found myself vicariously uncomfortable for all the people around us.
“What are they thinking?”
I realize, sometimes, we base so much of our actions and decisions on what other people think. Once I realized that we were all just being our true selves, all of those worries and the discomfort went away. People will stare, some may snicker and poke jokes, but it’s important to realize that those people just don’t understand; You learn not to take it personally. - Accept people for who they are.
Adding to the previous point… there’s something beautiful about watching others, unabashedly, be themselves. It’s even more liberating to know that people don’t have to be “fixed.” They are who they are. Accept it. - We all have special needs.
On the application for this trip, one of the questions was “What are some of your special needs?” This opened my eyes to realizing that we all do have special needs. It doesn’t need to be a disability or something you were born with. There will be always be circumstances in which we need to lean on others for help.
5. Explore & play as often as you can.
It was refreshing to be around a group of light-hearted and adventurous individuals who knew how to have a good time. It’s so easy to fall into the trap of constantly putting in work, that we forget to play. (I can’t tell you the amount of games and thumb wrestling matches we played.) You don’t realize how important play and exploration is until you immerse yourself in it. Be mindful.
On the last day of the road trip, coming back home on the bus, I had time to reflect on everything that I had learned and experienced. As I sat and looked around at all the happy faces of those excited to see their family, I started to think about my newborn niece, Hannah Sofia. Hannah was born with Down Syndrome and she’s the reason I wanted to learn more about the special needs community.
At that moment, on the bus, I pulled out my notebook and started…
“Dear Hannah,
Always know, no matter what, you will always be loved…”
I broke down into tears.
I couldn’t really tell if they were tears of joy or tears of sadness. The combination of smiling faces on the bus, the beautiful Wyoming scenery, and Coldplay’s ‘Fix You’ playing in my ear, assured me that it was definitely a bittersweet moment. I thought about Hannah’s future and what her life might look like. I thought about my brother, his wife and everything they must be going through. And then… I thought about how beautiful it is that organizations like The Wayfaring Band exist and how grateful I felt to be a part of the band.
Below is a video of a previous awesome road trip. To learn more about the organization click here.
