Baba I love you but…

My father and I have a weird love/fight relationship. After my mother’s passing; I was told by my father to be the grown up, to take care of my sister. Which I did and still do in my own way. Whenever I was given a order by my father; I followed it without questioning him to his face. That all changed when I moved to Pakistan. Seeing the freedom that our women had here blew my mind, despite it still being very conservative. When we lived in Saudi Arabia, the female population is really repressed there; we cannot go outside with a male companion. In Pakistan however, we can leave the house unaccompanied. This was scary for me at first. But then, I eventually got comfortable and enjoyed my new found sense of freedom. My father moved a year after us and he couldn’t recognize me anymore. I was more confident, not afraid of speaking up in whatever I believed in. Because of these changes in me, we started fighting. He can’t grasp the idea of me being grown up despite telling me to be that my entire life and is constantly worried about me . I’ll always be his little girl despite having 6 younger siblings. Baba I love you but you need to trust me and my instincts more often because I can take care of myself; just like you’ve always wanted. Hopefully one day I’ll be able to make you proud.