How to Use the 4R Formula to Recover from Relapse

Atlanta is a southeastern city where you can enjoy the flare of New York along with the open space that makes the south a comfortable place to live. As I walked on the Beltline next to Piedmont Park with a friend, intent on cheering her up, I’m reminded of how easy it can be to relapse into depression even after months of conquering the emotion. Here are the four things I shared with her to help her recover before the sun went down.

Reset. Reset your thinking. “A relapse in the progress you’ve made is mentally stressful and emotionally draining. It makes you feel isolated, alone, and betrayed by your own lack of self-discipline.” This may seem harsh to describe in terms of lacking self-discipline because that may not always apply, but something did escape our notice. It could be not resting or a trigger we overlooked distancing ourselves from. Reset your thinking by deciding that you can still recover and get back on track. Hit the mental reset button so you can:

Redirect. “The decision to start again is the first of several decisions that need to be made. The second decision is to redirect your focus and energy to how much better your life can still be…The relapse you’ve experienced is now part of the past…leave it there.”

Reclaim. “The third decision is to do anything and everything you can to apologize, forgive, or correct yourself to stay on course. If others were involved or hurt by your actions, do what you can to make it right. “The actions you take are designed to re-build the belief that you can still win.”

Recenter. “Recentering is to get your footing back on solid ground mentally and emotionally. Reestablish your foundation by reminding yourself of the reasons why you want to succeed and reviewing how far you’ve come.” The three steps to get you recentered is to self-analyze, show gratitude, and do a reality check. I won’t go into the steps in this post, but all the quotes I’ve shared are from Broken — Rising from the Ashes — How to Get Over Things that Crush.

By sundown, with some gentle prodding and direct questioning, my good friend was able to pull herself out of the blues using the gratitude step to find her spiritual center. Sometimes we just need someone to remind us of how beautiful our imperfection really is.

Wish you all the blessings and success you deserve.

Floyd

P.S. If depression goes deeper than the “blues” or is consistent over a long period, it’s important to seek the advice of a trained medical professional.