Bolton Dare to Dream — Part Three: Bounce Back
Before we start, let’s take a look around and see how our favourite players are doing. Mark Kerr, recently moved to Sunderland, has broken his leg in a reserve game against Birmingham and will be out for six months — get well soon mate. Villareal have made a bid of £975k for Alex Farnerud and if terms are agreed I doubt we’ll be signing him for the next few years. I’m still waiting for the new year to see when Tobias Hysen’s release clause activates and Hammarby finally allow Tonton Zola Moukoko to leave.
We’ve got a big game coming up — Middlesbrough away to start the Christmas period, 11th v 12th. These are games that we need to be winning if Europe is to remain a possibility. I make one change — Gazza replaces Jermaine Johnson — and we welcome Jeff Smith back to the bench, who takes the place of Bulent Akin. The Turkish midfielder is complaining about not being offered a new contract and then keeps turning it down when I do, so he’s probably not going to be in the squad for much longer. If Tonton or Hysen agrees to play at the Reebok, Bulent will be first out the door. But let’s put that aside for now, and focus on the game.
My facepalm is audible.
It’s a pretty shocking day all round. I’ve realised that the issue with the team is not chance creation, but chance conversion — we miss about as many shots as we hit the target with, and then you’ve got the keeper to deal with, which on this game is easier said than done. Voulgaris has a pretty poor game in nets and I might give him a break for the next couple of games. The sole bright spark is substitute Smith, who scores a consolation goal from a corner and is a general thorn in the side of Middlesbrough. Every cloud and all that.
Alex Farnerud opts for a sunny spell in Spain with Villareal, and quite honestly I can’t blame him. He can go and score goals for the Yellow Submarine in La Liga to his heart’s content, and we’ll keep a space for him at the Reebok when he eventually decides to join us. So it’s more see you later than goodbye.
Anthony Barness is also complaining about his contract, so I transfer list him — we’ve got more than enough depth at right-back. After our hammering at the hands of Middlesbrough, we look to get back on the horse at home to Southampton. I opt to revamp the defence, with Jussi coming back into goal, Ricardo Gardner returning at left-back, and an entirely new centre-back pairing of Teddy Lucic and Gudni Bergsson. The only other change is Smith, replacing Ginola.
Jussi doesn’t exactly cover himself in glory by conceding to Brett Omerod after just three minutes, but to be fair to him he sharpens up afterwards and makes several crucial saves that arguably keep us in the game, though a well-marshalled Saints defence seem to have kept us out, only for Djorkaeff and Ricketts to combine for the latter to score his 10th goal of the season with 25 minutes left. We hang on for a point, but it’s not really what I wanted, even against a good Southampton team who sit in a deceptively low 16th place.
It’s FA Cup draw time. Will we get a weak opponent?
Could be worse. Especially for some…
Yikes. A broken leg, at 36, could spell the end of Gudni Bergsson’s career, which would be a shame considering his contributions to both club and the Icelandic national team, having won 77 caps. For our next game, away to high-flying West Brom (fourth in the league) I replace him with N’Gotty. The Frenchman has a habit of either picking up a 6 or and 8 rating — let’s hope today is one of the latter.
It was not. West Brom thoroughly outplay us and their sole goal, from Jason Roberts in the first half, would have been joined by a few more if not for Jussi. It feels like ever since I moved from the old database to the new, I’ve been operating on the wrong wavelength. Our passes aren’t slick, we’re getting torn apart down the flanks, and every defence is a brick wall, even against teams lower down the league. I promised European football, but at this rate I’m fighting to keep our place in the Premier League. And I need to work out what’s going wrong.
When you’re struggling with your team’s tactics, the last thing you need is to face the league leaders, yet for the second time this season, we’re off to Anfield to play Liverpool. Fitness issues mean I have to rotate somewhat, but at this point I doubt it matters. If we can get anything out of this, I’ll be delighted.
Don’t let the 1–0 scoreline fool you, we were never in this, from the very first minute when El-Hadji Djouf scored the goal. Liverpool didn’t click as well as they’d like up front, but they bossed the midfield and employed some agricultural defending. We’re allowing far too many teams to bully us, and it’s got to stop. That, combined with the mysterious performance loss of Okocha, is contributing to our slump.
And, as I expected, Bergsson’s injury has ended his career. A sad way to bow out.
The games are really taking their toll now, and I’m forced to rotate again for our next game against Chelsea. Frustrated with the performance of my forward line in recent games, I take the drastic step of starting Armstrong and Facey up front together. Last time we faced Chelsea, they humilated us 7–2, and to be honest, I want to lock myself in my room and let my assistant manage. But the show must go on.
Oh my fucking God, we actually did it.
Suddenly, the sun is shining again. Birds are singing, and so are the fans! What a performance, especially from that man David Ginola, who sets up Armstrong’s first goal and scores two of his own to end the game as a contest in the first half. Gazza’s injury takes off some of the shine, but his replacement Jeff Smith adds another just before Eidur Gudjohnsen’s consolation. Consider this revenge for the farce of Stamford Bridge. C’mon Wanderers! Now we can enjoy our Christmas party!
Some might argue keeping almost the same side (barring Gazza, who’s out for a month with a pulled hammy that may or may not have been exacerbated by his antics at our Christmas party) for our next game, against Birmingham, shows complacency, but what if this is the formula we need? What if Chris Armstrong and Delroy Facey are better than Michael Ricketts and Jay Jay Okocha? OK, fine, I’ll bring Djorkaeff back in as well. But I have confidence we can have a great Boxing Day game.
OK, it’s another draw, but there are plenty of positives to take from this. Yes, we conceded as soon as Delroy Facey opened the scoring in the 70th minute, Clinton Morrison replying for the hosts, but we had eight shots on target, looked good in the air, genuinely offered attacking threat… this is good football! We’re well off the European places now and only a miracle of miracles could get us high enough for the UEFA Cup, but there’s an outside chance of Intertoto Cup qualification. It also means we’re going to have to really focus on our FA Cup campaign, which will start against Fulham on the 5th of January. First, though, we have two more league games.
Hang on, hold that, there’s news from Sweden…
Yes! Tobias Hysen is, whisper it quietly, one contract negotiation away from signing. Now, on to those two games.
The first, and least important, is against Tottenham, for which I will play a heavily rotated side. So rotated, in fact, that centre-back David Holdsworth makes his first start of the season. There’s firepower involved too, though, as evidenced by the selections of Ginola and Ricketts.
It’s yet another one of those days where we just don’t seem to have the edge. Sergei Rebrov scores the only goal early in the first half and all of our subsequent good moves are either made by or come through Ginola, though Jeff Smith once again impresses off the bench. Voulgaris is good in goal though I still prefer Jussi for now.
Happy New Year lads! No break for you I’m afraid, because we’re off to play Manchester United! Last time we faced the Red Devils we gave them a good go of it at the Reebok, falling just short but with plenty of encouraging signs. Well, the time is past for encouraging signs, and what I need are tangible points. So, if you can, lads, try to not be hammered.
For the first half we mostly hold on and I’m beginning to wonder if Sir Alex allowed them to party a bit too hard over New Year’s, but then Veron scores after Jussi strays off his line, undoing some good effort over the half. Van Nistelrooy and Forlan pile on the misery and we lose yet again.
The problem is our defence. None of our centre-backs have really shone, with Teddy Lucic being the best of a mediocre bunch. Hendry is skilled but nearing the end of his career, N’Gotty has been unhappy all season due to struggling with lifestyle, and the less said about Kevin Warhurst, the better. Mike Duff is the only player with an average rating above 7 and we’re still being torn to shreds down the flanks. A lack of a real presence in DMC has also been a concern since Kevin Nolan left, with Nicky Southall and Stig Tofting not up to the job. Fortunately, I may have a solution. Long-time series supporter star_bury suggested I look up Neil Scally at Dumbarton, and boy is he an upgrade on anyone else I have.
Aggression 16, Stamina and Strength 19, Tackling and Work Rate 20 — this guy is the business, and valued at just £65k. Signing him and Hysen could go a long way to turning our form around.
Left back Simon Charlton comes to my office and demands that, as a “regular member of the first team” he should get a new contract. Well, I don’t know where you got that idea, Simon, but if it’s a new contract you’re after, you can always find it at another club. Derby were already interested, and after I transfer list him for £400k, Birmingham and Cambridge United start circling. They’re welcome to him, as far as I’m concerned.
The Bolton board are still fully behind me, which is good because after Stuttgart, I’m not sure I could take another early sacking. Far less welcoming news is an injury to Stig Tofting in training that’s going to rule him out for three weeks and takes us down to one specialised DMC in the form of Southall, with Warhurst and N’Gotty also able to provide cover. I really need Neil Scally, now more than ever.
Right, this next game is critical — Fulham at home in the FA Cup, our last realistic chance of European qualification. I make one change from the United game, restoring Michael Ricketts to the forward line. If this first season is to be considered anything of a success, we need to win this competition, and the last thing I want is to go out at the first hurdle.
The team sees the challenge and rises to it magnificently. 18 shots for us, 13 on target — and critically, two goals to Fulham’s none. Ricketts scores after eight minutes but sees it ruled out for offside, then gets himself on the scoresheet after fifteen. Edwin van der Sar is a brick wall in goal, but Fulham rarely threaten, and Jay Jay Okocha, after being denied several times, finally scores after 73 minutes. He recently put pen to paper on a new five year contract, and I’m hoping this heralds a change in form. For now, we’ve got a morale boosting victory, and gotten through to the next round. The board and fans are delighted, and so am I. Is this the game that turns our season around?
Dumbarton reject my bid of £65k for Neil Scally, so I offer £150k over 12 months, which is also rejected. Can we at least get a nice FA Cup draw?
Yep! Mid-table Division One team Nottingham Forest isn’t a gimme by any means, but it’s a good draw by FA Cup standards. We’ll play them after league fixtures against Blackburn and Newcastle. And there’s some good news…
He only wants £6,000 a week to play. He’s happy with squad rotation terms. One of my Cardiff City Super Swedes is on the verge of joining me at Bolton.
YES! TOBIAS HYSEN IS HERE!
And, as a bonus, we get £400k for selling Simon Charlton to Cambridge United, plus an extra £40k for flogging reserve striker to Luton. Who cares, Tobias bloody Hysen is here!
Our first game with our new Swedish playmaker is Blackburn at the Reebok, so the atmosphere will be good for sure. Tobias is the only change to the XI, replacing Jeff Smith, who takes Bulent Akin’s place on the bench.
Well, if this what we’re going to play like now Hysen is here, maybe we’ll get into Europe this year after all.
This is by far my favourite game of this series so far. Djorkaeff opens the scoring in style from a free kick, Ricketts doubles the lead in five minutes, and Ginola scores the first of an eventual three goals, including a free kick of his own. Andrew Cole and Ferdinand Vierkalu reply for Blackburn, but it’s little more than a slight inconvience. We’re firing on all cylinders at the best time and it’s great to see.
I celebrate by selling Anthony Barness to Oxford United for £325k, well below his value, but at this point it’s probably best for both parties for him to leave. I wish him luck in the rest of his career.
We’ve got Newcastle next, and the team is raring to go. More of the same, please, lads.
No, no, not like that. Five shots on target, four goals. Bit of a shocker from Jussi, if I’m honest. To be fair, Ginola had a goal ruled out for offside that would have made it 2–1 after 60 minutes, but otherwise we didn’t play all that well. Alan Shearer, though. The guy operates on a different planet sometimes.
Let’s hope that was a blip, because next we face Nottingham Forest in the FA Cup and it’s a game we should win. To keep the side somewhat fresh, Gardner is subbed in for Victory, and Ginola had a bad game last time out so he can sit on the bench while Jeff Smith starts. It’s a cup game against lower league opposition. Nothing bad ever happens in those, after all.
It all goes as planned, with one figure taking centre-stage. Jay Jay Okocha finally produces the performance we know he’s capable off, with a first half brace — his only indiscretion is straying offside during an attack and therefore denying Tobias Hysen his first Bolton goal after the latter scores off a rebound. Forest do hit back when Des Walker heads home from a corner in the 40th minute, but I was never really worried. Fifth round, here we come!
One of the standouts of the game, I have to say, is Nicky Southall. Ever since I questioned his abilities and started looking at Neil Scally, he’s upped his efforts, and while he’s not quite on Nolan levels, I no longer wince whenever his name appears in the commentary, so fair play.
Now, fifth round draw time.
Again, it’s a nice draw. Non-league Burscough have been one of the stars of this year’s tournament, having knocked out Oldham and Wigan on the way to the fourth round, then securing a famous 1–1 draw that sets up a replay at Goodison Park. If Everton do win, as most expect, I think we can handle them, having beaten them in the league already this season.
OK, we have some good news and not so good news. The good news is that Paul Gascoigne is now fully fit, but the not so good news is that Jay Jay Okocha has been selected in Nigeria’s squad for the African Cup of Nations. Which is great for him, don’t get me wrong, but we could lose him for nearly all February, depending on how far they progress. At the minimum, he’ll miss a couple of games, just when he was starting to get going. It’s good that we have the likes of Armstrong and Facey to deputise.
Unbidden, I suddenly remember that I was going to check on the availability of Tonton Zola Moukoko after Hysen’s signing. Turns out he’s been listed for loan, but I throw a cheeky bid of £120k at Hammarby just to see what they say. They reject it, saying they’ve “only recently purchased him.” I’m sorry Hammarby, but that’s bullshit — you’ve had him for a whole season and not played him once. But fine, I’ll play your game. Here’s a loan bid, in which I’ll pay all of his £75 a week wages! You’re robbing him blind, I swear.
They accept it, at least. Brilliant-
Tonton! How could you not want to come to Bolton? We’ve got Ginola, Gascoigne, Okocha and Hysen, for god’s sake? They’re not even playing you at Hammarby, I’ll give you guaranteed game time! It’s a win-win! But if you really want to stay in Sweden, fine. We’ll still be here next season.
Oh fucking hell, it’s Liverpool again. I’m forced to swap out Okocha, who’s off on international duty, for Armstrong, but otherwise leave the side as is. I’m sick of Liverpool FC by now, I’m telling you.
We got a point! It was scrappy, sure, but I’ll take it. Smith opens the scoring in the 59th minute when Dudek hits a goal-kick at him and he heads it home. Perhaps feeling bad about the mistake, he then proceeds to give the ball away to Danny Murphy, allowing the latter to equalise. But a point, against the leaders, is very much welcome.
The games are coming thick and fast now — Leeds are next. I decide to replace Smith, who had an indifferent game other than his goal, with Gazza, and Armstrong with Facey. Can we go and get more points against a top-six team?
We do get a point, but it should have been more. After six minutes, Nigel Martyn takes down Michael Ricketts in the box and we win a penalty. We never win penalties. This is a golden chance. Youri Djorkaeff takes it, and of course Martyn saves. Some great defensive performances from both sides follow and the game ends as a goalless draw. One point gained or two dropped? I think I’ve made my opinion clear.
Everton beat Burscough 2–0 in their replay, so we’ll face them at the Reebok for a place in the quarter-finals, and from there this run will look serious. You can’t discount a team who’ve made it that far.
Before that, though, there’s one more league game to play, against Glen Roeder’s West Ham. The Hammers sit 13th in the league and beat us 3–2 in a thrilling match earlier this season, but I’m hoping we don’t see a repeat. Due to tiredness, the side I put out is heavily rotated, but I’m hoping we can pull through. Even if Bulent Akin is in the midfield.
This is the kind of game we’ve been on the wrong end of all season, but for once it goes our way. We rain down shots on the West Ham goal and it’s only David James that prevents the game from becoming a rout. Armstrong tucks home a rebound from Bulent Akin, of all people, to open the scoring after 14 minutes, then Hendry makes the game safe after 71 with a header from a corner, his first goal of the season. That’s three valuable points taken against a mid-table rival, and we’re full of confidence going into the fifth round tie.
Our entire season could hinge on this one game against Everton, but I’m no stranger to a big occasion. Everyone’s ready to go, bring it on…
What’s that?
Oh fucking hell.
Part Four coming soon!
