THE VOID: It was all worth it.
A short story for you.
I can’t breathe.
I have an overwhelming feeling something is wrong and I can’t do anything about it. In a box and there’s no moves I can make. Stuck in a prison of my own choice. I can’t breathe. The unknown is suffocating me like a black smog filling up my body and the only option is to let go. I surrender to it not knowing what will become of me in the coming moments. Covered inside and out in this heavy darkness, a dark cloud with some rain would feel substantially better because at least the droplets of rain are proof of life. I still don’t see anything, can’t even fathom the next move, still swimming in a void. Even though I surrendered, the tiniest piece of me is still fighting it. I’m thinking what if I just let it all go completely and float in this darkness. I’m tired of fighting, tightening, holding on, controlling, molding. What if… I just let myself simply BE. The tiny piece of fight in my heart, I softened into her and told her thank you for all your love, protection, and guidance, it’s been a ride of a lifetime, I love you with every part of me. The softening in my chest spread through my entire body, a warm and tingly sensation. The space around me filled with ease and everlasting peace. Mentally, I’m confused because this is not at all what I thought would occur. I never fully knew the power of surrendering. As I floated in the void, I knew I was held, loved, and kept by something much more vast than me. That type of love, when you’re not sure where or why but it just always is. That true unconditional love. I want to be loved like this forever. In the void there is a golden light towards the end. The darkness moves me towards it, getting closer and closer.
I start to feel the bubbly butterfly emotions that come with doing anything for the first time. At the tail end of the void portal, I pause to thank the void for the dark nights and every lesson each taught me. I kissed it goodbye giving it my love. The light starts to beam brighter full of rainbow hues excited for my arrival. I smile and feel the joy rushing over me. It’s better than I could have ever imagined it. Deeply enamored by the capacity of strength and resilience in me I whisper to myself “it was all worth it”.
Thank you so much for reading this letter. I’d like to invite you to join my Forevóuare creative community, let’s explore together.
Continue to find the deepest of comforts within yourself.
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