This story is unavailable.

Pigs fly. I have a bridge for sale, near my ocean-view condo on the Arizona coastline. Obamacare is like a miracle, unicorns were seen boarding the Mother Ship, women never lie about rape, welfare reform has transformed America’s cities, Dorothy is doing a speaking tour preceding her upcoming reunion visit to Oz, lawyers are like totally ethical and honest people, Elvis now works on a catfish farm in Arkansas, and


Hilary (only) has pneumonia, everything’s fine.

Break’s over, back on your heads.

One clap, two clap, three clap, forty?

By clapping more or less, you can signal to us which stories really stand out.