Life Was Aghast
//Life Was Aghast — 04022019
Standing up on my own two feet
Crawling out from this space underneath
One that didn’t really exist
Even for me this was all new territory
My screaming eyes were dwarfed out by a degenerate’s attempt to cry
But I never did
So I crawled back inside to see
On what I’d missed
Of what could actually and entirely set me free
I had to always keep on exercising
For the fight to be less agonising
Whilst swimming and running
With my own dark side
Like I’ve been twinning
Chasing but never winning
Giving but never receiving
You know what they say about deceit
It’s a bitch in the eyes of the surprised
When it hits you its like you lived your life
But most of it merely passed you by
You can nearly cry
When you can no longer betray
That what you have also portrayed
The only thing you’re going to think to say
Is why me? What did I even do to deserve this?
Your whole life will begin to feel haunted
You’ll slip right back into the hole that you thwarted
Only to eventually realise
How your problems were all self-crafted
That they were all in your head
And the moment you acknowledged them
They left you for dead
But you have to know
That in order to climb back out
You have to give more than what you’d given before
‘This time is going to be different than the last’
A promise you’re going to have to make and obey
And forever keep moulded in your past
Today, every time you look at the stars
You will see yourself — smiling back
Knowing well — how once your life was aghast
