
In the communities I venture in, there is an adversity against labels. More than often I hear that people do not wish to be labeled. They think that labels limit them and restrain them. Labels frame them in a frame that they don’t belong to or are in denial that they do belong to that label. Being labeled can lead to angry reactions and some labels has negative undercurrents. Being a white, male, heterosexual (three labels here) can be seen as evil, depending on which group you ask.
But why are labels important? Labels are simply a container for a set of characteristics with the purpose of effective and clear communication. You can’t have clear and effective communication without labels! Let’s make a basic 101 example about labels and their use. I want you to put the mug on the table. Each of the bold words is a label. I refer to the person saying the sentence, want refers to a thought in my head, you to the person that I am talking to. Put refers to a kind of motion, mug refers to a form of container for liquid. On refers to a location and table refers to an object with the purpose of putting things on it. So removing all the labels from this sentence leaves us with: to the the. In my book, that surely isn’t clear communication.
Of course, this is a very easy and bit cheap example. When dealing with more complex labels, it’s often unclear what exactly is meant. Though this is more often the fault of attribution people make that the actual label. Let me use the label everyone carries for their entire life and is exclusive to them: your name. In my case that’s Frank. This describes (among other things) a white, male, heterosexual, cis gender, polyamorous and in a relationship. As you can see, the label Frank is a container for several labels. Let’s pick them apart.
White refers to the color of my skin and only to the color of my skin. Male refers to the biological gender I currently have. Cis gender refers to that I also feel the same as my biological gender (male). Heterosexual refers to a sexual interest in the opposite sex only. Polyamorous refers to being open to multiple love relationships at the same time. And finally in a relationship means that I have at least one relationship.
These are the definitions of the labels that are contained in my name. Nothing more, nothing less. They do not say things about my political opinion, about some kind of superiority, about my sexual activity, my intelligence, my skill, my talents, my personality, my values, my convictions or anything else that people contribute to these labels. Some people contribute the label male with that I also feel male (or are even happy with it). Yet this is not the case and therefor I have the label cis gender. This does mean that someone who feels like a woman but biologically is male, still is a male. But instead of being cis gender they use transgender, which means their gender identity and/or expression doesn’t match their biological gender. With only this information, one does not know what gender they do identify with. Then you add a label like woman. If someone just uses male, you can ask if that also is their gender identity. Then you give them room to add another label either confirming (cis) or denying (trans).
This makes for clear communication. Labels are very defined containers and people should stick to those definitions instead of adding their own meaning to it. If you never heard of a label, ask what it means or open up a dictionary. Nearly all labels can be found in there. Changing a label to suit you situation only creates confusion. For example if I where to say I’m a heterosexual cis gender male who has a sexual interest in other cis gender males. That creates confusion and miscommunication. I can even go that far that it’s intentional miscommunication.
But what if the label you have now doesn’t fit anymore? Well that’s very simple, you change it. So instead of saying heterosexual in the above example you should say homosexual. Then it’s clear that you are attracted to people of the same sex. These days there are so many labels that there is bound to be one that would fit you. Just below an image of the various gender identities that exist and I don’t think this contains them all, providing there would be an actual limit (I heard we’re already up to 60).

And if even if you then can’t find a label that fits your specific thing then you can make a new one. This is how all the above gender identities came to be. But what you should not do is claim a label for your specific thing that already describes something else. You also shouldn’t design a new label for something that is already a label or use a label for something that is already describing something else. This only creates (intentional) miscommunication.
In short: labels are needed to have clear and effective communication. Use labels properly and don’t hijack labels that don’t fit. If the containment of a label doesn’t fit you, you are free to change it and yes, communicate that as well.