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“Successful mothers are not the ones that have never struggled. They are the ones that never give up, despite the struggles.” — Sharon Jaynes

I always swore I would never let money stop me from growing my family.

After our first son, we made some drastic changes. Like I left my job that paid pretty darn well…

Shortly after, things just started falling apart. It was like a snowball effect.

Every new challenge we faced was worse than the one before.

I literally felt like I was underground and every time I tried to climb out, my hands just slid. There was no way of getting out.

So when I found out we were expecting again, I think it’s safe to say we both freaked out because we were way less stable than we had ever been before.

But I also knew that no matter what, this baby is a blessing. Maybe it’s the mom instincts but I just thought, things are going to be OK.

There were many times where I didn’t feel like it was OK. I felt like everything was over. Everything I ever wanted for myself and my family was just gone.

So, no, I didn’t just stay positive through it all. I had to fight to remember to stay positive.

It was so hard. And I was depressed for a while when I would let it all overwhelm me BUT I had to find a way. That’s what mothers do. They find a way.

So what did I do?

  • I had an HSA (Health Savings Account) card that I was saving to use for whenever we had another baby. My plan was to use this to pay for the deductible for baby #2. I definitely patted myself on the back for this one because other than this, I had no plan.
  • I applied for a scholarship that would go towards a birth center — the birth center that I had my heart set on ever since it first opened. Well, this girl got the scholarship! And guess what? It was the amount of the deductible that I needed to pay. Talk about a blessing.
  • So since I didn’t have to worry about my deductible, I used the HSA card to pay for counseling and acupuncture to deal with all the crap that kept being thrown at me. This has been the best investment ever!
  • Gym? I paid $25 for a whole year to use the gym in a community center down the street from me. How did I pay those $25? I used money I earned at a yard sale.
  • I was so set on having a doula for my birth. I was going through so much and wasn’t sure if my husband and I would still be together by the time the baby was born and I believe with all my heart that support is absolutely necessary when giving birth. So the amazing woman that had done my birth photography and placenta encapsulation for my first birth was the woman I hired to do those things AND this time, she was also going to be my doula. This was a huge expense. And I did pay half out of pocket but the other half I paid with the money I earned selling a bunch of stuff around the house on apps and I used some birthday money that I had also saved.
  • I thankfully used a lot of hand-me-downs for maternity clothing. And for my first pregnancy, I tried to buy a lot of clothes that I can wear whether I’m pregnant or not like maxi skirts, maxi dresses, leggings, stretchy tank tops (<<those are good for nursing too).
  • What about the baby clothes? If I have a boy, I have my son’s clothes in storage (most of his clothes were hand-me-downs too). If I have a girl, I have hand-me-downs from family members with daughters.

I know that maybe already having an HSA card or being awarded a scholarship isn’t likely to happen to everyone but maybe that can help you think outside the box and think of creative ways to make it happen for you.

If your heart is set on having another child, there’s always a way.

But remember, to take care of yourself along the way because stress will sneak up on you. It’s a scary ride but it’s possible.

So become that mother warrior and find a way.

Reach out!

There is so much out there — so many resources. You can do it too!