Image by Hans Eiskonen

I need an answer here, people

This isn’t a blog, it’s a question. While it might read as playful, I’m deadly serious.

Is it appropriate to ask a grown up, who you are often around, to eat with their mouth closed?

This is life 101 isn’t it? As a kid you’re told to eat with your mouth shut because, well, manners.

If I’m honest, I’ve wanted to ask this for a long time. Months. But even the idea of writing about it makes me feel uncomfortable, let alone the thought of actually confronting someone.

I’ve researched it. Apparently the fact I am irritated by this isn’t all that uncommon. It even has a name: misophonia. Or at least it falls under the umbrella of misophonia which is a hatred of sounds.

To me that’s a bit extreme. It’s not so much that I have a hatred of people eating with their mouth open, it’s more that I have an uncontrollable physical reaction. One that sees me leave the room, or start humming really loudly.

So, what do I do?

No seriously. What?

Given this is something most of us are taught when we are children, is calling someone out on it, even in the most polite way, a condescending comment on their upbringing? I don’t mind being upfront about things, but not at the expense of personal offence. There’s nothing cool about making someone feel bad about themselves.

But on the other hand, it’s revolting.

I’ve come to the point where I’ve been able to hear the difference between a banana, porridge and a muffin. You’d think they’d sound the same, and there was a time where I’d have agreed with you. But as it turns out, the skill of being able to tell them apart is something, with exposure, your ears can learn.

Is this something I just need to get over? Do I just accept that my destiny was always to become a misophoniac with an award winning ability to distinguish certain foods’ consumption?

What’s the deal here? Help needed.

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