loop

One day I awoke as me, completely unaware how I got here. I spent every moment since, trying to figure out how I got here.

As a female sex who cannot keep her hair open, as a younger sister who already has a growing love for her soon-to-be-born niece, temporarily known as Sitara, as an older sister who can sit with her brother and talk about what to fill our lives with, as a cousin who can talk about infidelity to her younger cousin yet had a problem talking to her partner; as a girl who loves to dance and sing random songs into the air and fight with her father about arranged marriage, as an individual who cannot stop talking about institutionalised education and mindless consumerism to somebody who takes to caffeine in moment either of overwhelming exhilaration, inspiration, feeling of nothingness, or of rebellion. Yes. Rebellion. As nowhere close to an ideal functional adult framework yet happy. Someone who takes to books and graphic novels at the thought of nothing, to also somebody who abandons the same paintings and books, to just sit and stare at the sky out of laziness.

Been a funny ride, eh?

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