while I stood there, engulfed in flames, you found an escape in the cool, clear air away from me
I always said back then that I don’t care if I burned to ashes for you. I always said that I don’t mind setting myself on fire for you, for us. My love for you was a fierce, consuming flame. I was willing to sacrifice anything and everything. I was ready to give all of myself — to endure the heat and the pain — just to keep you warm.
I believed that if I burned brightly enough, my light would guide you. I believed that my warmth would comfort you. I thought that my sacrifice would be enough to show you the depths of my love, to make you understand how far I was willing to go for us. But as the flames grew higher and the smoke thickened, you turned away and ran from the fire I lit for us, as if you were afraid of the smoke it caused.
You ran from the smoke, from the intensity of my love. I told myself; maybe it was too much, maybe it was too overwhelming. Maybe you couldn’t handle the heat, couldn’t breathe through the suffocating haze. Or maybe, you simply didn’t want to stay in a place that demanded so much from you. While I stood there, engulfed in flames, you found an escape in the cool, clear air away from me.
The fire I set was meant to light our path. I wanted to create a bond stronger than anything else. But instead, it consumed me — leaving me scorched and alone. I gave all I had. I believed that it was what you needed, what we needed. I was willing to endure the pain, the heat, everything because I thought it would lead to something beautiful.
But now, I see the truth. I see that love isn't about setting yourself on fire for someone else. It's not about sacrificing your own well-being in the hopes that it will be enough. True love is a balance, a give-and-take, where both hearts are equally warmed and no one is left to burn alone.
As I stand in the ashes of what once was, I realized that I must learn to protect my own flame, to nurture it without allowing it to consume me. I must find a way to love that doesn't involve self-destruction, that doesn't require me to set myself ablaze just to prove my devotion.
To the one who didn’t burn with me and ran from the smoke, I will finally let go of the fire that burned us so fiercely. I will rebuild from these ashes, stronger and wiser, with a love that shines brightly but does not destroy. I will find a way to be warm without setting myself on fire, to love deeply without losing myself in the flames.
