Die In a Fire, Hillary Clinton!
Like some bad horror movie monster returning for one more jump scare, Hillary Clinton has resurfaced. This time she is berating voters in states that Barack Obama handily won for being backward looking because they didn’t vote for her. She lamented that the value of votes is determined by the principle of “one man, one vote” instead of net worth by pointing out that the places she won made up two-thirds of the United State’s GDP. When the predictable outrage at her comments happened Hillary Clinton puffed up in indignation and whined that men who have run for president and lost are never told to shut up. Even though they are. Frequently. Since Secretary Clinton seems to be struggling with how to behave after losing a presidential election to a clearly deranged orange tinted con man who ran on a shamelessly fascist platform and doesn’t want to be told to shut up, let me be so bold as to offer her a little advice:
Die in a fire.
From the moment Hillary Clinton cut her political teeth she has been toxic. She began her journey into politics as a Goldwater Girl stumping for segregationist Barry Goldwater. It is possible that young Hillary didn’t agree with Goldwater’s opposition to Civil Rights. Goldwater’s desire to dismantle the social safety net seems a little more her style. The racism and restoring of the newly overthrown white supremacist laws of the southern states was probably just an acceptable byproduct of what she really liked about Goldwater’s vision for America. It has always been important in Clinton’s mind that the poor know their place beneath the heel of their economic betters. If it is her heel on their throats so much the better! Hillary thought so much of Goldwater’s presidential run that when it came time for her to choose her own presidential logo she copied the style of her first political idol.
In college while on her first date with future husband Bill Clinton, Hillary crossed a union picket line. Then she bragged about that shit. Bill obviously wasn’t the first person she dated and in one of those weird social coincidences, she briefly dated left-wing economist and future Labor Secretary Robert Reich. I do not presume to have any real insight into Mr. Reich’s personal life. He was married for years and has a couple of sons. He is currently single. Intelligent and handsome gnome that he is, I can only assume he is doing well on the 60+ dating circuit. If he died alone having never known the touch of another woman after Hillary Clinton and was then eaten by his cats he would still be one of the luckiest men in history for having dodged that bullet.
Hillary Clinton’s entire political career has consisted of her being on the wrong side of history, changing her stance when it is no longer politically viable and then acting like she hasn’t changed her position. Clinton was all in on the disastrous war in Iraq. Her staunch opposition to gay marriage only changed after public opinion swung massively in its favor and many states had same-sex marriage statutes. Her only constant and unwavering principle is that she is on the side of the economic elite. Everything else is negotiable or subject to change based on the latest polls or focus testing.
Such a loathsome figure in the American political landscape is understandably going to run into trouble when seeking public office. Her first run for president consisted of her getting laps ran around her by a black one-term senator with a Muslim name. Despite behavior that put her in the running for the sorest loser in history, Barack Obama bent over backward to reach out to Clinton and unite his party after kicking her ass. After becoming president Obama gave Hillary Clinton the enormously powerful and important job of Secretary of State. Note that he wisely chose not make her his running mate. I know I wouldn’t want my life being the only thing standing between a power-mad psychopath and her dreams either!
Determined never to make the same mistake of allowing anyone to oppose her again, Clinton nipped all Democratic opposition to her candidacy in the bud for her second run. Resentful of the DNC imposing rules that ludicrously placed her on the same footing as an obvious inferior like Obama during her first fun for president, she made sure she was in control of the DNC’s finances on her second run to prevent such an outrage from happening again. Everything looked to be on track for her to receive her coronation as the Democratic Party’s nominee until a socialist from Vermont shuffled out of the Senate one afternoon to tell a dozen or so reporters that he would be challenging Clinton in the Democratic Primary. Things began to unravel after that.
It took Clinton a little while to realize she had an actual problem on her hands. Smugly telling the people they need to win elections to be “realistic” and “pragmatic” had been a very effective tactic for Democrats since her husband first ran for president. It sounds so reasonable. It’s also a scam. The only reason that what we want isn’t realistic is that people like them don’t want it to happen. If we elected someone other than their corrupt asses it suddenly becomes much more realistic to get what we want. After 25 years of seeing that little sleight of hand in action, people finally started catching on to it and they had had enough. In order to stop the growing left-wing menace, Clinton turned to the tactic of divide and conquer that has always worked so well for the Right. Obviously, Clinton couldn’t turn to the old right-wing standby of vilifying black men (not that this has stopped her in the past) and pushing Islamophobia wouldn’t fit in very well with her diversity message. Clinton had to create a new villain on the left to rally people against. She settled on me. White Leftist Males or Bernie Bros as she and her surrogates would call us would be the new evil menacing America that must be crushed at all costs.
First, we were labeled as racists. Calling people racist who are explicitly anti-racist requires a few mental leaps. There was also the inconvenience that we were rallying around a Jewish man who was putting his body on the line for Civil Rights in the 60s instead of Hillary Clinton who is the living embodiment of white privilege. In order to make her narrative work, left-wing economics had to be made racist. Pursuing both racial and economic justice at the same time was now an act of racism. Never mind that Civil Rights leaders from W.E.B. Dubois to Martin Luther King Jr. came from the same Democratic Socialist philosophy as Bernie Sanders. Socialism itself was racist.
Despite the best efforts of Hillary Clinton not every Bro supporting Bernie was white. In a rare display of taste Clinton and her minions chose not to label them as race traitors. Instead, they opted to pretend they didn’t exist leading to things such as the hilarious Twitter hashtag #BernieMadeMeWhite. Ultimately the Clinton campaign’s tactics were ineffective on younger black voters, but it was enough to keep the older grandma portion of the black electorate firmly in Clinton’s camp and deliver her the black vote.
The easier accusation to level against white males, along with our newly white black brethren, on the left was that we were opposed to Clinton due to misogyny. I will have to admit we walked into that one. Part of the reason is it is just so easy to call a woman as repulsive as Hillary Clinton a cunt. I mean we call guys we don’t like dicks, so what’s the problem with referring to a woman by a crude name for her gentiles? Come on, we know better. In the future let me suggest the more gender-neutral term shit bag in both instances so we don’t wind up labeling people by their gentiles. I will still defend the use of calling her a corporate whore. We called her husband a corporate whore too after all. Being a corporate whore has nothing to do with being a woman. It is about prostituting your political positions out for money. Men can be whores too, so this is a gender neutral thing to call a prostitute! No? Well, let me know what to call people like this that still maintains the proper amount of invective and I’ll switch to that instead. Fucking language, right?
While we men on the left blundered our way into the misogyny trap that Clinton laid, left-wing women were immune to this accusation and they hated Hillary Clinton with the same fury as the Bro-y-est of Bernie Bros. No one could possibly accuse a woman of being a misogynist! Instead what Hillary Clinton did was send Madeline Albright out to damn them to hell for putting their political beliefs before vagina solidarity. Later on, after realizing that it was mostly younger women that were opposed to her Clinton sent out Gloria Steinem to address this phenomenon. Gloria Steinem said that “…when you’re younger you think: Where are the boys? The boys are with Bernie.” Well shit, Gloria, you got us!
White Leftist Cock has always been the Left’s best secret weapon. Its persuasive power over women should never be underestimated. No matter race, age or creed women will abandon everything else just for a chance at it. Lifelong lesbians will make an exception for it. Right wing men bluster to make up for not having one. We all just whipped those things out and started playing them like flutes and women under 40 followed us off like we were a legion of pied pipers. Women were defenseless before the masculine siren’s call we sent out! So remember, ladies, Gloria Steinem was right. How you chose to vote had nothing to do with your own free will. You were under the spell of white leftist cock*! (*now available in a diverse multiracial assortment of flavors)
These assorted absurdities were unfortunately enough to win Clinton the nomination and give her the coronation she felt she was denied 8 years prior. Sanders delegates still held massive sway over the party platform, but through her surrogates, she assured her corporate masters that the platform was a meaningless document. Sanders supporter Nina Turner was denied a speaking role for being a black woman to avoid confusion with the public about black women being the sole property of the Clinton campaign. White noise machines were installed to mask the boos she and her most noxious supporters received when speaking. Having selected a running mate from the most corporate of Corporate Democrats to let the financial elite of the country know she was on their side, she set off for the general election against Donald Trump.
And she fucking lost!
She lost to Donald Trump. She lost to a deranged lunatic. When faced with the choice of turning the leadership of the country over to her or a madman, the nation went with the madman. 100,000 rust belt Obama voters chose Donald Trump over her and flipped the entire region and several states away from the Democrats. Florida and Iowa which Obama won comfortably flipped to Trump. Indiana and North Carolina which Obama won the first time and came close the second went firmly to Trump over her. It is impossible to overstate the level of catastrophic failure that is. She and everyone associated with her disastrous campaign have forfeited the right to speak on anything ever. I don’t even want their opinion on fucking breakfast after this shit. I hold them just as responsible for the national disaster currently unfolding as I do Donald Trump and his cohorts. We are not in this situation because of Russians or racists that were always voting Republican anyway or the Left’s lack of enthusiasm for voting for someone who earned our hatred. Even Donald Trump himself is almost incidental. We are where we are because of Hillary Clinton and her lackey’s political failings. Yet they still keep talking.
I know that Hillary Clinton has recently taken great umbrage at being told to shut up, so let me say this instead; Fuck you. Fuck old women like you and Gloria Steinem who sought to use your feminism as a tool of economic oppression. Fuck people like you and Ta-Nehisi Coates who have tried to make racial justice the enemy of economic justice. Fuck you and your good friend Henry Kissinger too.
Greg Ganues is just some dude. He has opinions and an asshole. He has been illicitly published by a foreign website. He wrote a vapid Generation X fluff piece and resurrected Klaus Nomi to sing bumper music at the end of an essay. He will happily argue with you on Twitter.
