Lingering in this comfortable but lethal silence gives me enough time to think about everything we could have been if my luck had been different…
In this silence lie my thoughts and desires. This silence is equal to the silence you gave me in response to the countless love that I gave you. Lingering in this comfortable but lethal silence gives me enough time to think about everything we could have been if my luck had been different, all the fictional situations that will never happen, all the kisses I dreamed of, this silence invokes you to torment my mind and shake my already wounded feelings. When I think about you every fragment of my body is terrified, my mind and body alert me of an imminent danger. You carry with yourself utter grief and absence of love. My heart slows its beats to go unnoticed so you don’t take it again. My apparent calm breathing, false facial expressions, are all I have when the tiniest memory of your existence drills into my thoughts. My tears tell me that they are about to burst into a deep and sincere lament. But just by looking into your eyes all the security protocols in my body disappear and I fall back into your dark tentacles that drag me into the depths of a mysterious abyss loaded with terror and agony. With each artificial smile of yours, my body becomes unsteady and I begin to lose my balance. My nerves are altered and begin to move incessantly, revealing my weakness to your hypnotizing and evil powers. Losing all trace of serenity when I’m in your presence. When you leave, my entire being suffers a devastating catastrophe, everything is destroyed, you have looted all the love and stored it in your impenetrable vaults. Once again I have to rebuild everything, one memory at a time.
© Gabriel Berm