KILLING ‘NST’ CREATES ME INTO A BETTER PERSON THAT I NEVER IMAGINE I CAN

“Gut Feeling” Yeah, everyone may experience it anywhere, anytime. It may also influence your decision of talks and actions towards people. Gut Feeling divided into three major types; Self Talk, Intuition, and Fear. In this session, we will focus on our discussion about NST, so let’s begin from Self Talk.

Self Talk categorised into two forms; Positive(PST) and Negative(NST). Positive one may give a great impact on your confidence and good feelings to your days. It can be developed by treated your Gut Feelings properly. Somehow developing PST is not as easy as we thought. PST needs to be trained in conscious state of mind frequently. Some people whose obsessed by intuition development may success someway. They freed them from NST.

And how about Negative Self Talk (NST)?

Basically, NST is an inevitable self talk that results thoughts or feelings that often demotivate the individuals. NST derives from certain causes such as experiences, exessive emotions, and irrational fears, and it mostly happens to women rather than men. Why? Here’s the outline. According to The Journal of Neuroscience, 15 May 1999, 19(10): 4065–4072; Woman brains have a larger composition of ‘Grey Matter’ (sensory perception such as seeing and hearing, memory, emotions, speech, decision making, and self-control) which creates a stronger ability in ‘Gut Feeling’. — Impurities of Gut Feeling is one thing that causes NST. — Albeit, some researchers found several populations of man that also have larger composition of Grey Matter just like woman. We definitely can’t count the amount of that population, that’s why NST can happen to everyone. NST is really no good. It makes you feel bad about what happens at the time and somehow can bring you down all the time and lead you to a huge depression. At the worst, even PST isn’t helpful.

Sounds creepy, right? The question is “’Can we overcome the NST?” The answer is YES.

I’ve ever experienced one pace of the most difficult time in my life. At that time, I encountered NST almost every time, everyday. I totally realized and felt bad on how it was consuming me badly. I kept reminding myself of how valuable I am. Then I took actions. Beside allocating more time for praying and contemplating, I bought some psychology books and learned them earnestly. In general, it’s true that ‘Gut Feeling’ can be a ‘Good’ caution for someone self awareness to be more wide-awake — only if —it’s not exaggerated, because everything that excessive is negative (NST). Let’s take a glance on how it creates me into a better person that I never imagine I can.

Firstest with the mostest! Identify your Gut Feelings.

Based on several books and journals I’ve read, I made Classification Tree of Gut Feelings. Here we go.

How do you know whether it is PST or NST? Giving yourself question directly! For instance; you may question yourself as quick as you can — is there any actual information or facts for what I am thinking right now? — is there another positive perspectives to look at? — am I subjectively assesed the thoughts? — at last, can I change this bad feeling/thoughts into something positive? if not, then it’s NST.

Here are the best common forms of NST:

• Filtering. You magnify the negative aspects of a situation and filter out all of the positive ones. For example, you had a great day at work. You completed your tasks ahead of time and were complimented for doing a speedy and thorough job. That evening, you focus only on your plan to do even more tasks and forget about the compliments you received.
• Personalizing. When something bad occurs, you automatically blame yourself. For example, you hear that an evening out with friends is canceled, and you assume that the change in plans is because no one wanted to be around you.
• Catastrophizing. You automatically anticipate the worst. The drive-through coffee shop gets your order wrong and you automatically think that the rest of your day will be a disaster.
• Polarizing. You see things only as either good or bad. There is no middle ground. You feel that you have to be perfect or you’re a total failure.

Those common forms above I get from mayoclinic articles is only a few example, in fact, you may find it in much forms.

When you already stated it as NST, what can you do? KILL IT OFF!

Step 1: Catch yourself in the act of NST. You need to recognize when some unhappy, unproductive thoughts are dominating your brain. It’s amazing how good we can get at ignoring negative self-talk. But, if you really pay attention, you’ll see the signs. If you’re agitated, moody, emotional, or can’t sleep, you can thank NST for that.

Step 2: Write it all down — ALL of it. Grab piece of paper, or hop on your computer and start writing out everything you’re thinking. Don’t filter. Just keep writing until there’s nothing left. Ignore the randomness of your thoughts. Don’t judge the scattered statements running through your head. The point is to relieve your brain of the NST tsunami overwhelming your thoughts.

NOTE: For this to work, you must physically write out the NST. Don’t think you can just ponder it. Let’s face it, that’s what you’ve been doing thus far and it’s failed you. Plus, as you’ll see in the next step, there’s more writing to do that you definitely can’t do in your head (yet).

Step 3: Challenge every assumption. Our thoughts are subjective. We interpret our situation to help us rationalize i.e. to make sense of our world. Unfortunately, it’s our human nature to avoid pain and failure, so we tend to create negative thoughts designed to keep us from taking risks. We make assumptions and broad generalizations to help us cope. We create NST. It’s time to call out your NST for what it is — lies designed to hold you back from going after your dreams. How do you do that? Ask yourself two questions about every thought you wrote down as follows:

NST: I am not successful enough.
CHALLENGE: Says who? What definition of success am I using?

NST: I am not smart enough to achieve my goals.
CHALLENGE: What proof do I have I’m not smart enough?

NST: I am a failure.
CHALLENGE: Am I really failing in all areas of my life? What’s my definition of success?

Step 4: Re-write and repeat for sixty seconds. Now, take your NST and re-write each statement into something objective, and if possible, positive. Then, read and repeat in your mind for one minute the new, better self-talk.

I’m a better Me. I need to stop acting dramatic and see the progress I am making. I’m learning and growing as a professional. I am getting better every day. Build better life by killing off NST and build a trust.

I believe in Experience + Learn = Grow