Buzz

A good friend of mine once told me that when you try to write something profound, you actually end up ranting. So the irony of course is when you try to rant, you actually end up writing something profound. When it’s almost half past 3AM and the only companion you have is the steady buzzing of the aircondition, the floodgates of your mind open up like a stream of water. Rushing, gushing, ever so slowly. It’s like cupping water with your hands as I say many times. You try to stop it but it just flows endlessly, escaping your grasp. It comes to a point that it’s futile to resist the ebb and flow. To its stream I fall victim upon.

Have you ever thought about existing? Like taking three minutes of your precious time just to stop and think of the banalities of being. How you’re just a part and parcel placed in this world like a custom-made Sims character. It would be nice if you already knew what part you’d be playing. If you fit in just right with the people around you or if you’re just a glitch in the fucking system — waiting to be weeded out at someone’s disposal. Do the people around you just tolerate you or do they genuinely accept your flaws? Will you ever fit in this puzzle of life and complete what you’re destined for?

They say that the most profound thoughts come at night. They thought wrong. The profound thoughts hit when a string has been struck, a bell has been rung. It’s when the roaring, beating of your heart urges you to be more, to be your true self. Rants and profound thoughts, do have a thin line in reality. They should be taken ever so lightly with a grain of salt. It may sound like ramblings to someone, but mean the world to another. There is no better weapon than words to put it out in the open.

The floodgates of my brain are about to close. It just needed a proper receptacle after all. For in profound ramblings such as these, a home is found to quiet down the war in my head.

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