If you ask the average person on the street if they knew what Dyspraxia was, a certain percentage would probably admit that they have never heard of it. Another large percentage would probably admit that whilst having heard of it, they are not familiar as to what exactly it is. And only a small percentage of people would be able to tell you exactly why this is.
To be honest I am not surprised by the lack of awareness. Even though Dyspraxia has been known about for around 50 years, the efforts to make the general public aware of this condition have not been the best. Especially when you take into account how knowledgeable disabilities like Dyslexia and Autism have become in the same period of time.
Whilst many Dyspraxic individuals might be offended by this, speaking as one myself, I am not wholly that offended by this fact. Whilst it is a shame that Dyspraxia is not as well known as these other disabilities, I am glad to say that finally more people are becoming aware of it.
However amongst those who do are aware of Dyspraxia, what many are not aware of is how complicated this disability is. For it often affects an individual suffering with this disability far more than one initially thinks it does.
So this brings on the question:
So What Is Dyspraxia?
There are quite a few different definitions of Dyspraxia though the similarity between all these definitions is poor motor coordination. Dyspraxic individuals tend to have issues with carrying out everyday tasks: be they as simple as pouring a glass of water without spilling to as complicated as riding a bicycle.
The best definition that I have come across is from Wikipedia which describes Dyspraxia as:
'... a neurodevelopmental disorder characterised by impaired coordination of physical movements as a result of brain messages not being accurately transmitted to the body. Deficits in fine or gross motor skills movements interfere with activities of daily living. It is often described as a disorder in skill acquisition, where the learning and execution of coordinated motor skills is substantially below that expected given the individual’s chronological age. Difficulties may present as clumsiness, slowness and inaccuracy of performance of motor skills (e.g., catching objects, using cutlery, handwriting, riding a bike, use of tools or participating in team sports or swimming). It is also often accompanied by difficulty with organisation and/or problems with attention, working memory and time management.'
Unfortunately even this definition doesn't cover the true depth of Dyspraxia as one area which Dyspraxia can also affect is speech. Many (though not all) Dyspraxic individuals have Verbal Dyspraxia where there are issues with speech. Issues can range from getting words jumbled up to not pronouncing individual words properly.
As well as trouble with pronouncing the actual words, Verbal Dyspraxia can also affect the rate and pace of speech. I for one used to struggle with speaking too fast to the point where those listening would find it hard to understand what I was saying. Also I would often speak very loudly without even realising it.
Though I have had help over the years and so can fortunately say I no longer struggle with these speech issues, I am told that often when I speak I do have the habit of coming across as intense. Most of the time I am not even aware that I am doing this.
It should be said that some Dyspraxic individuals who have Verbal Dyspraxia have the opposite of what I had. Instead of shouting, they tend to speak too quietly. Also they may speak too slowly instead of fast like I did.
The Lesser Known Symptom Of Dyspraxia
As well as Verbal Dyspraxia, there is another way which Dyspraxia can affect us and this is with our emotions. Nearly every Dyspraxic individual that I have spoken to (and having run a Dyspraxia Support Group, I have met hundreds of Dyspraxic individuals in my time) struggles with anxiety, depression or both.
Personally I can't say whether our emotions being affected is due directly to having Dyspraxia or else if it is just a consequence of having Dyspraxia. Seeing as the majority of us would have faced various difficulties when we were younger (as well as even today) did this cause us to become more anxious and/or depressed in the process!
I am not ashamed to admit that when I first learnt how Dyspraxia can cause those of us with it to be more prone to anxiety and depression, it was an eye opening moment for me. I say this because growing up, I was fortunate enough to be diagnosed from an early age and so got the help that was required.
Despite all the help that I received, very little of it aimed at helping with the emotional side of Dyspraxia. I wasn't really taught any strategies on how to deal with anxiety when it came up. Likewise many Dyspraxic individuals who struggle with depression never received many strategies on dealing with their depression.
This lack of helping us with the emotional side was not done deliberately; it is only in recent years that a link has being discovered between Dyspraxia and anxiety/depression. It was just under a decade ago when the Dyspraxia Foundation did a survey and discovered that pretty nearly all students with Dyspraxia struggled with anxiety and depression.
From the survey, the Dyspraxia Foundation concluded:
“there is increasing evidence of associated anxiety, depression, behavioural disorders and low self-esteem in children, teenagers and young adults with dyspraxia”
Fortunately when it comes to anxiety and depression, there is a great wealth of material on how to manage both these unpleasant emotions. Also there is no short supply of help and support should either one get too unmanageable. I for one am not ashamed to admit that I have had therapy before to help deal with worries.
Socialising & Understanding Non Verbal Cues
Many Dyspraxic individuals will often find it difficult to make friends. This is in part due to the fact that we often struggle with picking up on non-verbal cues. Or to put it in other words, have a hard time picking up on what was not directly said.
Often our brains will not pick up on sarcasm or we will take what someone is saying too seriously. As a result, we will often say the wrong thing and as such, maybe taken as either odd or just not very bright.
Case in point, I remember when I started my first job out of university. The building I was working in was a large, modern building made mainly out of glass and steel beams. Anyhow as I was taken to my desk, I mentioned to the person escorting me how nice the building is and how the glass made it look futuristic. The lady escorting me along replied
"Yes but we often get birds flying into the windows." On saying this, I didn't know whether she was joking or being serious and so replied
"Oh that is a shame. Poor birds." It was then that I realised she was joking as she gave me an odd stare like I was sort of idiot.
Unfortunately as Dyspraxia is not so well known, to try and explain to others that you often misread social situations will just make things even harder. Many will naturally assume that what you really have is autism; this is because when you discuss learning disorders and how they can affect you socially, their minds will gravitate towards autism.
In one's defense however, Dyspraxia (as we mentioned earlier) is nowhere near as commonly known as autism. As such, many are mentally just trying to link what you are saying with the nearest thing they know. Unfortunately this can be a bit frustrating as Dyspraxia is not the same as Autism but a separate condition in itself: although the two certainly do have similarities.
Personally when it comes to social situations, I have come to realise that the best thing one can do is just let it go. If you have Dyspraxia, then you have Dyspraxia and you don't need to justify its existence. As the old adage goes, just be who you are.
One thing however you should never have to put up with (whether you have Dyspraxia or not) is bullying. In an ideal world nobody will be bullied but unfortunately we don't live in such a world and as such, some people are picked upon by others. And as individuals, bullies tend to pick on those who they perceive as weaker than they are. So if you are the one in the group who struggles to read the situation or a joke, then bullies are likely to flock towards you like vultures to a carcass of meat.
Growing up I used to get bullied quite a bit but over the years have managed to mainly overcome being the victims of bullying. I have also written a book about it since then called 'Beat The Bully: A Guide To Dealing With Adult Bullying.'
Anyhow my main suggestion with regards to dealing with bullies is:
1 - let others know of your concerns. Bullies thrive on your willing silence: the more people who know about it the greater the chances are that someone will help.
2 - this bit is far easier said than done but don't let a bully get under your skin or upset you. See them as they are: sad people with big egos.
Whilst the second bit of advice may seem contradictory to the first bit of advice, in reality it isn't for when I say see the bully for who they are, this doesn't mean ignore it. Do put your foot down to stop it but try not to let it bother you too much.
Conclusion
As someone who has Dyspraxia, I can say that whilst it certainly can make life harder, it can also make life different: and not necessarily in a bad way. Yet as a Dyspraxic individual, I know that how my Dyspraxia affects me won't affect another Dyspraxic in the same way.
Yet in this article I hope to have explained to you just what Dyspraxia is, how little is known about it amongst the general public. And why it affects us in more ways than the original experts thought it would.
Last off I would like to say that if you have Dyspraxia, then realise you are not alone and that there is plenty of support out there. Even if the health service in your country is not all too familiar with it, there is lots about it on the internet. On Facebook, you can always join groups like the Dyspraxia Support Group, to learn more about Dyspraxia and how it can affect one.
