38- Doing the devil’s job

The First Writer Ever
Nov 1 · 2 min read

I visited old grumpy Mr. Fig before bringing the story to Jason’s Pelts. I’m not sure why his approval feels so appealing at the moment. But it’d certainly make me feel better to know his opinion about it.

First snow came tonight, and he’s done nothing to take care of the white barricade at his door. He doesn’t seem to be expecting any visitors. So, I start shoveling snow away from his pathway. Slowly.

I don’t even shovel the snow in my own cave entrance.

So, why should I care here.

Also, my arms are already hurting.

Halfway through this tedious process something hits me straight in the head. I’m knocked out in the floor now. Tiny drops of red painting the white canvas.

“Not that I even asked you to clean my pathway, kid. But if you’re arrogant enough as to assume I need help without even asking first at least do it properly. I’ve seen people shoveling shit with more enthusiasm than you”.

You’ve got to be kidding me. How can the old man be so heartless?

“I’m bleeding! What the shit Mr. Fig!”

The old man starts laughing. It’s not that common to see him smiling, the least of all making any happy noises such as a proper laugh. It’s like babies when you hit your pinky toe with the legs of the table. How those little cutie pies can find your suffering so hilarious.

“What on earth are you doing here anyway. Are you starting to fall in love with me or what? Because I don’t want any horny young boys lurking around my house any more than I want a new hemorrhoid in my ass!”

He’s a charm.

“I wanted to review an add I made for Jason’s Pelts with you. I have the interview tomorrow and thought you might be able to help”.

His face turns red with anger.

“So, its final. You have as little heart as brains. Working for a… for those… I can’t even think of an insult big enough for those evil bastards”.

“What? Why? What do you mean?”

“I can see you’re still too young to give a damn crap about anything that doesn’t revolve around your own dick. But there’s other things in this world aside from finally trying to get rid of that precious virginity of yours. Jason’s Pelts tortures poor animals to make fashionable pelts for the assholes living uptown. I’m sure they don’t need your help to fill up their pockets even more”.

Well, that’s something I didn’t expect. I guess I don’t really think much further than getting started in my career. Not so easy to be picky when you can’t even get a job. Also, the freaking robes are supposed to be made of some cotton plant, not animals.

“Anyway. Put some snow over the scratch in your head, finish the pathway, and come over here. Maybe some hot tea will wake up your stupid brain”.

I guess he can read my mind too.