What is it like to date a Korean man?

GarterLucas
6 min readMay 2, 2024

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Ever dreamed of having a boyfriend like Kim Soo-Hyun? As a dating coach who’s helped many Western girls find Korean guy, I can tell you it’s not just fantasy. If you’re looking for that Crash Landing on You K-drama style romance, your best bet might be connecting with single Korean men online. But there’s more to it than just swiping right. Let me break it down for you.

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What is it like to date Korean men

Korean dating customs are deeply rooted in tradition, emphasizing respect, loyalty, and familial ties. The hierarchical structure of Korean society extends to relationships, where age and social status play significant roles. Understanding these cultural nuances is essential for navigating the complexities of dating Korean men.

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Chivalry and care

Korean boyfriends often take pride in being attentive and caring towards their girlfriends. This can manifest in various ways:

  • Carrying your bags
  • Opening doors for you
  • Ensuring you’re warm (lending their jacket is common)
  • Checking in on you regularly via text or calls

Gift-giving culture

Gift-giving is a big part of Korean dating culture. Korean men often express their affection through presents, which might include:

  • Couple items (like matching phone cases or rings)
  • Practical gifts (like skincare products or electronics)
  • Seasonal gifts (for holidays or your birthday)
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🔥Read also: How to Date Asian Men?

Food and dining

Food plays a central role in Korean culture, and this extends to dating:

  • Korean men often pay close attention to whether you’re eating well
  • They might cook for you or take you to their favorite restaurants
  • Popular choices for couple dining often include sharing soju (Korean rice liquor) and eating instant ramen together, especially late at night — it’s seen as a cozy, intimate activity

Preferred activities

Common date activities might include:

  • Karaoke sessions
  • Hiking or outdoor activities
  • Visiting themed cafes or restaurants
  • Going to movies or exhibitions
  • Booking a hotel room for alone time

Financial aspects

While things are changing, there’s still an expectation that the man will pay for dates, especially in the beginning. However, younger couples often split costs or take turns paying.

Meeting the parents

Introducing you to parents is a big step in Korean culture. It usually signifies serious intentions. If you’ve met on single Korean man dating sites, this might happen later than you’re used to, as many Korean males wait until they’re sure about the relationship’s future.

Pros and cons of dating a Korean guy

Some green flags when dating a Korean man include:

  • Respecting your opinions and independence
  • Introducing you to friends and family
  • Being consistent in communication
  • Showing interest in your culture and background
  • Hardworking and diligent, striving to achieve their goals and provide for their families

Hong Du Sik in “Hometown Cha-Cha-Cha” is a Green flag.

Watch out for:

  • Controlling behavior disguised as care
  • Unwillingness to compromise on cultural differences
  • Keeping the relationship secret from friends and family

Park Jae-Eon in “Nevertheless” is a big Red flag.

To me, Koreans appeared somewhat feminine, and this observation was unexpected. It was surprising to see how they embrace their femininity without reservation, a trait that sets them apart and offers a valuable lesson for men from other cultures.

How to date a Korean man?

Whether you date Korean men or hoping to, here’s my little guide to navigating the process.

Master the art of aegyo (but don’t overdo It)

Aegyo, that cute, flirtatious behavior you see in K-dramas, can be charming in real life when dating a Korean guy too. But remember, a little goes a long way. Practice your best puppy eyes and sweet voice, but use it sparingly. You want to be endearing, not annoying.

Embrace Korean beauty standards (with your own twist)

A single Korean man often appreciates the “natural” look popularized by K-drama actresses. Think dewy skin, subtle makeup, and healthy hair. But don’t lose yourself trying to fit a mold. Blend Korean beauty trends with your personal style for a look that’s uniquely you.

Learn the language of love (literally)

Nothing impresses a Korean boyfriend more than effort to learn his language. Start with romantic phrases like “saranghae” (I love you) or “bogoshipo” (I miss you). But don’t stop there — aim for real conversations. It shows you’re serious about understanding his culture.

Master the social media game

In Korea, relationships often bloom online before moving offline. Create an Instagram-worthy single Korean men dating sites Newsfeed that showcases your interests and personality. Engage with his profile thoughtfully. Remember, a well-timed comment can be the start of a beautiful love story.

Understand (and respect) Korean dating culture

Korean dating culture has some unique aspects that might surprise you. Here are some specific examples:

  1. Couple rings: Many Korean couples wear matching rings as a symbol of commitment, often earlier in the relationship than Westerners might expect.
  2. Monthly anniversaries: Couples celebrate each month of their relationship, not just yearly anniversaries.
  3. Couple outfits: Matching or coordinated outfits are popular among Korean couples, from subtle matching accessories to full-on identical outfits.
  4. Pepero Day (11/11): Similar to Valentine’s Day, couples exchange Pepero sticks (chocolate-covered cookie sticks) as a sign of affection.
  5. Formal confession: In Korea, relationships often officially start with a formal confession of feelings, called gobaek.
  6. Strict scheduling: Many Korean couples have set days for dates, often referred to as ‘dateing’.
  7. Rapid relationship progression: Relationships often move faster than in Western cultures, with major milestones happening earlier.
  8. Public displays of affection: While passionate kissing in public is frowned upon, holding hands and subtle touches are common.

Be your own leading lady

While it’s fun to take cues from K-dramas, remember — you’re the star of your own life. Be confident, pursue your passions, and don’t be afraid to show your true self. The right Korean oppa will fall for the real you, not just your K-drama imitation.

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Where to find Korean men for dating?

In this section, we’ll explore two primary avenues to meet Korean guy: online and offline. Each path offers unique opportunities to initiate connections and discover potential partners.

Online methods

After you find out how to date a Korean man, exploring online platforms, such as single Korean men dating websites, apps, and forums, provides a convenient avenue to connect with Korean single guys worldwide. Websites like YouMeTalks and forums like Reddit offer diverse opportunities to initiate conversations and forge meaningful connections. It’ll not be difficult to understand the dating platform: it is enough to register, take a quiz, and familiarize yourself with the filters offered by the platform. After that, your perfect match can be found in a matter of minutes. I advise you to try it, online services now offer a wide range of possibilities.

🔥Read also: How to Date Asian Men?

Offline ways

Venturing from single Korean men dating apps into offline spaces, such as K-pop events (girls usually go to such events to admire Jung Kook, but they can also be open to meet Korean men), Korean clubs, and cultural gatherings, offers immersive experiences and face-to-face interactions with Korean people. If you’re a student, look into study abroad programs in Korea or join Korean student associations at your school. If you work for an international company, explore opportunities to work with Korean colleagues or in Korea. If you’re in Korea, popular areas like Hongdae or Gangnam are great for meeting people. Join groups focused on Korean interests like K-dramas, K-pop, or Korean cuisine.

Wrapping up your K-drama romance quest

While cross-cultural dating might not be as smooth as a perfectly scripted K-drama “Alchemy of Souls”, it can certainly be just as exciting and romantic. Remember, there are pros and cons to dating a Korean guy. On the plus side, you might experience a level of attentiveness and romance. You’ll likely be introduced to a rich, vibrant culture and possibly even learn a new language. However, cultural differences can also lead to misunderstandings, and traditional expectations might clash with more modern viewpoints. In the end, finding love is about creating your own unique love story.

Related articles:

💌 Mail Order Husbands: Traits, Preferences, and Relationship Dynamics
👨‍💻 International Long Distance Relationship: Tips for Success

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GarterLucas

I studied psychology and sociology at the University of New York and worked in the personnel department and as a coach in several companies.