After graduating from university, I had high expectations of what my first job would be like. The thinking was that this role would define where my career would head to, the prestige, the wealth, and my growth in a professional setting. Then it gradually sinks in, that ultimately I want to contribute meaningful work day in and day out.

I was accepted into IT project management within financial services because of my engineering background and my enthusiasm to communicate. As a young professional, I was excited to be part of a growing organization. I was quick to have inputs and ask questions, and wonder why groups work the way they do, or the responsibility within departments, to the current (or lack of) processes in place.

Slowly, I noticed problems and critical issues that were unspoken of. Some of these included why projects are going at snail pace or why individuals responsible for a deliverable where constantly pushing back deadlines and changing expectations. Unconsciously injected culture within the email etiquettes such as what to say, what not to say, and receiving and reading passive aggressive messages. The inner political fighting between departments on projects lead to cutbacks and restructuring. These issues were not always addressed which posed a big challenge for leadership.

This made me feel very uncomfortable. Most tech base companies such as Google, and Zappos, are transparent, and it doesn’t matter who you are — good ideas flow to the top. Being hired directly from college and into a corporation, one cannot fully understand the culture because it is a “black box”. Newly accepted grads have no idea what they are getting into except being able to pay off their tuition. I had some insights within the IT groups hiring strategy, and there is an overwhelmingly lack of young talent. With fewer young hires, corporations will remain in their ways and will not adapt to new innovated ideas or ways of thinking.

I feel an inner urge to prompts solutions to address this. Get individuals involve and contribute, spur new ideas and concepts, and drive a more innovative culture within the organization.

As a hackathon enthusiast, my proposal was to have an internal technology competition. Push tech employees, new and old, to propose their reservoir of insight, suggestion for improvements, and create prototypes to present. I reached out and contacted several top senior managers for feedback and approval to champion this. I was immediately shunned for contacting high above my rank. I was relayed to Human Resources for further collaboration. This lead to a shift from involving college campuses as part of the activity, to participating as a sponsor at current competition events. Granted it was not what I had initially planned and proposed, however it was still a very good starting point to facilitate change.

During this segment of time, there were detractors that questioned my motive and this project’s goal. I wanted to push for initiatives that I was proud of and with my current ability to do so. I didn’t go away, I kept pushing.

Finally, after receiving several personal phone calls by upper management, I was shot down completely and felt disheartened. As I update those detractors about the project, they weren’t surprised and spoke to me about their personal proposal when they first came into their position. They have tried pitch their operation improvement idea just like me and also had not succeeded — and now hesitant and deterred from pitching any other suggestions again.

This resonates throughout organizations not just from my personal experience. Workers felt that feedbacks and suggestion for improvements will never become reality and their ideas toss in the garbage. There is a fear of consequences, scare of blame or punishment. There is an unspoken hierarchal structure, where employees’ place is not to challenge existing operations. “When in doubt, keep your mouth shut.”