Like, Why Are You Single?

In today’s world, me being single seems to be the craziest thing people hear. I wouldn’t consider myself ugly, unattractive or unpopular. I am asked out on dates at least once a week by people I know and people I just meet. I just don’t like dating. Why is that so hard for people to understand?

To be fair, I have only tried dating a few times — with only one of those turning into a ‘serious’ relationship. But it just didn’t appeal to me. I enjoy spending my weekends and free time with a group of my friends having fun, at clubs, the movies, the beach etc. Cutting all of them off for the most part and focusing on just one person seems like a waste to me. I sound selfish, but honestly I would rather hang out with friends, and then focus on one other person. Me.

While clubbing on weekends with my friends, I am asked “what type of person are you looking for tonight?” Why do I have to be looking for anyone? Can’t I just go out and have a fun night with my friends. Luckily, my friends understand, and (mostly) agree with this. Sure. Sometimes it’s fun to hook up with someone on the dance floor, even go back to their place. But anything more than that, count me out.

A couple of times I have said “yes” to offers of dates. The first time I had said yes to coffee, the person automatically assumed we were a couple and said they loved me. When this almost happened on a second date — from that point on, even now, I always make it very clear that the date probably wont lead anywhere. Except maybe a friendship. I don’t understand why so many people get “dating” confused with “in a relationship.” One night I went on a date with two people, a few hours apart. I certainly wasn’t planning to love and marry both of them. I was just bored and wanted to get to know each one a little better.

My first real relationship ended pretty badly. Maybe that is part of the reason I don’t plan on getting together with anyone else anytime soon. It was a bit of a weird relationship.. I was lied to, stolen from and just deceive for the last few months. This was after I had completely upended my life and moved 3 hours away so we could live together. Talk about being a bad judge of character. Anyway, that was 3 years ago. I’ve grown a lot since then.

I don’t expect to see anyone permanently by my side in the near future, but who knows, maybe one day someone will come along and completely change my mind on relationships. Until then, I’ll keep dancing and partying with friends!