I Can Go The Distance

It was just this summer that I decided to take running to a new level. After spending about a month with my aunt in Dallas, Texas she convinced me that when I got back to Ohio I needed to join the cross country team. The coach had already expressed some interest in recruiting me for the team but I wasn’t sold on the whole idea of running 3.1 miles. I mean, I was a sprinter during track season. I heard that the cross country team ran an average of 6 miles per practice! How was I supposed to run more than 400 meters without dying?

“Humor me. Just try it Gabby. Trust me, you’ll love it.” She chuckled playfully.

My aunt ran for Cornell University, New York and still goes out and gets her miles in everyday for no other reason than her passion for the sport. I love running too, and so, after talking to her about cross country I was determined to go the distance.

In an excerpt from her book, “Running: a Love Story: 10 Years, 5 Marathons, and 1 Life-Changing Sport” Jen A. Miller reflects on how her motivation to run was morphed into an obsession to change herself. She illustrates the devastating effect this mindset had on her ability to run as well as how she lost sight of why she started running in the first place. Miller complicates matters further when she writes, “I kept running after that 5K, but it was for him”. In other words, she compromised her enjoyment of the sport for an unhealthy desire to please her boyfriend. I agree that it’s easy to get caught up in trying to please others by running for them because that’s what I did for the longest time. I was determined to make them happy. I could not care less about how I felt after I ran. I would show up bright-eyed and bushy-tailed to please. What I didn’t understand is that I was there to run, not to impress. Running really is a mental sport. You can be good, but if you run for the wrong reason(s) you will never be great.

I have come to realize that the only time I truly enjoy running is when I silence all of the outside voices and focus on myself and my goals. I’m the one who is putting blood, sweat and tears into my workouts everyday. I’m the one chasing after the results. I’m the only person who is going to push myself. Yes, my coaches encourage me to run faster, train harder, etc., but they can’t do it for me. Running is only 50% physical, the rest is in your head. I didn’t know what that meant until my coach taught me to believe in myself over anything else. I am all I have at the end of the day. What I accomplish, what I allow myself to achieve: is up to me. That’s a lesson I will never forget as long as I live.

This past Thursday I ran in my first outdoor track meet of the season (the 4x800, 300 meter hurdles, as well as the 4x400). Originally I was disappointed in my performance, then I stopped worrying about the place I came in and instead focused on the time of my races. I felt better almost instantly. I mean, I shaved 15 seconds off my 800m time. And that’s only the second time I have run the 800m in a meet! Compared to last season, I am already 4 seconds faster in the 300 meter hurdles too. I must say though, that the best feeling I had that day was running through the finish line and passing the baton in the 4x400 meter relay.

I cannot put into words how much I love exploding out of the blocks when I hear that gun go off . . . or the hugging the curves of the track as I sprint toward the finish. I feel like I am on top of the world. I feel so empowered and alive. I love getting that jittery feeling where I can’t sit still. I’m a horse chomping at the bit. My blood is pumping and my heart is racing, competing with my feet to cross the line. I feel strong, confident. I know myself when I’m running.

I fully endorse Jen A. Miller’s assertion that running for the wrong reason(s) will ultimately be your downfall. My advice for those of you who are thinking about joining us runners, is to find your purpose before you lace up those shoes and chase after a goal. Are you trying: To get in shape? To escape? To make friends? To find yourself? To try something new? Whatever the reason might be, make sure it’s what you want and that it’s good for you. I used running as an excuse to avoid my problems . . . now I run through my problems. To me, if you are not willing to risk it all, you do not want it bad enough. Simple as that. Running is in my blood. Running is what keeps me going, literally. I was willing to risk it all to find all the right things. I am glad to have found my purpose in running.

Miller, Jen A. “Running for the Wrong Reasons.” Well. New York Times, 03 Mar. 2016. Web. 01 Apr. 2016 <http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2016/03/03/running-for-the-wrong-reasons/rref=collection%2Ftimestopic%2FRunning&action=click&contentCollection=timestopics®ion=stream&module=stream_unit&version=latest&contentPlacement=6&pgtype=collection&_r=0>.