If I don’t keep cookies in the house, then I can’t eat them!
Ever said something like that? Me too.
And then when I finally did let myself eat the cookies, I’d go overboard.
In my mind, I’d hit a temporary jackpot and needed to fit in as many cookies as I could because who knows the next time I’d let myself do something like this again?
Even as someone who does my best to eat intuitively, I still find myself doing this from time to time. …
Last year, I worked my tail off to earn my health coach certification. The curriculum was way more intense than I imagined, so I was beyond stressed for several months. This girl was a mess.
While I had spent the previous several months studying, I spent the week before my exam on overdrive. Not only that, but my husband happened to be on a trip out of state. Plus I had to meet a critical deadline for work; and then my toddler got sick. It felt like my life was utter chaos.
And all I wanted was some freaking ice cream.
So I had some. And then I had more. And then I had more after that. You can probably guess where I’m going with this.
In the course of seven days, I crushed four pints of Ben & Jerry’s. Sometimes I even added marshmallows straight into the pint. One time, in a daze, I drizzled peanut butter on top. I was stressed and so was my sweet tooth. Even as someone who promotes intuitive nutrition, I still sometimes struggle with emotional/stress eating.
And honestly, I really didn’t feel like sharing this little “ice cream escapade” at first. The irony of bingeing on food while studying for a health coach exam is definitely not lost on me. But I decided to share as soon as I realized one thing:
I don’t hate myself.
Sure, I was a little embarrassed. And frankly, a little bloated. It certainly wasn’t intuitive — or smart — for me to eat all that ice cream. But if I picture how the old me would have handled a hiccup like this? I would have spiraled right back into all my disordered eating habits — a bottomless vortex of starving, bingeing, and depression. I would have felt disgusted and ashamed, and not let myself have any grace.
But I know better now.
That whole ice cream thing? It doesn’t define me. Instead, I immediately looked for the lesson. And that’s why I do what I do. I examine myself and my habits so that I can show you how to do your very best to eat intuitively. …