The Secret of true Happiness and how to Achieve it

Happiness.. Your mother tells you she just wants you to be happy, friends encourage you and say “hey, as long as you’re happy.” As you begin to wonder, what is this happiness they speak of and how do I get some of this? It is such a vague concept with several different definitions. A lot of them being socially constructed through peers and biased advertisements that imply that buying a certain product or service, or travelling the world will make you happy beyond your imagination!

Therefore, people tend to think it as the feeling you get when they buy something or the pumping of adrenaline when you lay your eyes on your crush. However, this is in fact the effect of over-stimulation. This sensation is considered as “fun”. This feels so good and you’re just ecstatic and feeling over the moon. Though at the same time, this definition of happiness doesn’t last very long. In fact, if you were to rely on this kind of happiness, you would also be extremely sad if you were to lose that material object or not have it in the first place. It could be that new iPhone you just got or someone whom you love deeply, because it is that attachment that you now relate your definition of happiness to.

Detachment

When you learn to detach your source of happiness from of all those things that you feel so close to, you unlock a deep level of appreciation and understanding for the people and things that come and go. As days, weeks, months, go by and you slowly and gradually detach from everything you start becoming emotionally numb because if you’re not happy about anything, sadness does not exist either, so then what are you supposed to be happy or sad about?

True Happiness

To answer that, you must understand this first. Happiness is a lot more subtle than that. Happiness is about understanding, feeling, calm energy. It is that silent hum when you are satisfied with who you are as a person and how precious all life is at it’s core existence.

A lot more of a well-grounded approach to happiness because

it begins deep within your core, expanding to every aspect of your life.

A massive change in perspective and the rewiring of your entire belief system that you have so far grown up with, takes time, patience and deep, deep focus. As this is something that can only be rewired in your brain at your most self-aware state of mind.

How?

To reach this state of a deeply focused mind to reset the currently set rules and stimulate calm energy within your core, you must enter a trance-state where you are completely and fully aware of everything. Feel as every breath enters and exits your body, with your body expanding and collapsing with every breath. The very specific feeling of the surface you are standing or sitting on. The wind and temperature in the air. The feeling of it on your skin. The subtle little sounds you can otherwise never notice, along with the loud ones. The smells of things. As your body completely focuses on the present moment and relaxes entirely. This is when your brain will be in it’s highest level of being. Undisturbed by the petty things, understanding and forgiving of other’s and your own mistakes.

Re-wiring

Finally, the rewiring. Once in this state of mind, ask yourself about the things that bother you and why. Really ask why and get down to the bottom of it. I promise you it is a lot deeper than you might have thought, because that is the person you were grown up to be and till now, identified with. However, now in this heightened state of mind, you are like water and can be molded around the shape of the container you are put into.

Think about the things that make you excited and happy. Think about why they make you happy. Now convert that over-stimulated limited time happiness, by focusing on the things that should make you happy and thankful. The fact that you are alive, in this time in age where the possibilities are endless no matter what you want to do. You can be whoever you want to be. There are just so many things we could be doing. Is worrying about things a way you want to be spending your time? Or would you rather be at peace with your inner demons?

Summary

To summarize, everyone wants to be happy. Everyone has their own definition of happiness. Many of them being very short-term and doesn’t last long. However, true, ever-lasting happiness comes from within your core, not from external factors. To achieve such thing you must remove the association of happiness from material objects and re-locate it deep, deep inside yourself.

Hope this helps anyone who is on a quest to find true happiness.

Dedicated to and inspired by, my dearest friend Jose Urbano