Who is Aunt Flo? Menstruation, I/DD, and The Talk

Having a child with special needs can be challenging. From a million doctor’s appointments, therapies, challenges with the daily routine, family dynamics — it literally takes a village to raise them. Having a girl with an intellectual and/or developmental disability or who is medically fragile adds another challenge — the menstrual period. How to explain it, how to manage it, and how to keep her safe.

So, how do you explain the monthly visit from Aunt Flo to your child with I/DD?

How do you explain it to a neurotypical?

Yikes! When I was growing up, back in 1980, my mom gave me a pamphlet from Tampax and told me if I had any questions, just ask. I didn’t dare. I resourced with my friend’s group by going to the library. Remember: this was before the Internet was even a thought.

Fast forward: As a nurse, I must answer the hard questions on all topics, including sexual health from my younger patients and students. Plus, as a boy mom, I fielded plenty of cringey questions. One caught me so off guard while driving that I almost ended up in a ditch.

With all three of my SPED boys–Autism Spectrum Disorder–we’ve talked about consent, pregnancy, birth control, and all the trimmings. I counted my blessings that I didn’t have to explain the menstrual cycle. I about died when Max asked how babies get out of a woman’s body, and I’m a nurse!