The Top Ten Worst Daily Fantasy Sports Players

Daily fantasy is one of my favorite things to do. I like it so much, I even play DFS for sports I don’t even like, like PGA and MLB. Of course, the fact that I run this blog with a lot of DFS content, I love the DFS community as well. 95 percent of them are good guys, one percent of them are @$$holes, and the last four percent fall into one of the following categories. These are:

The Top Ten Worst Daily Fantasy Sports Players

10. The Sharks

They are the necessary evil in daily fantasy sports. They enter pretty much every tournament and play the max amount of lineups that FanDuel or DraftKings will allow. They use complicated optimizers and algorithms to build their lineups, and one of them tends to win the big GPP tournaments seemingly every night. But, without them, the daily fantasy industry wouldn’t be able to survive. Without their cash flow, FanDuel and DraftKings may not have survived all their legal troubles. So while we all hate seeing them atop our leaderboards time and time again, without them we may not be playing daily fantasy sports at all in 2017.

9. The Brody’s

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The original “Shark Killer”, Martin Brody in the movie Jaws.

Okay, no one actually calls these guys Brody’s. I made the name up. But Brody’s are the guys that beat one of the aforementioned “Sharks” in either a head to head or they edged them out in a big tournament — then they brag about it like they just won a GPP. At this point, you might be asking yourself, why are you calling them Brody’s? I’m naming these guys after the most famous “shark killer” of all-time. Martin Brody from the movie Jaws.

A message to all the Brody’s out there, trust me, the shark you beat in a $1 head to head, it didn’t even register on their radar. When you play $1,000s every night, there is no way they are even looking at their individual matchups, but congrats on winning that 80 cents!

8. The Hypothetical Champions

“I was three players away from winning my GPP, I actually had the winning lineup all day, but at the last-minute I changed my lineup”. Now, don’t get me wrong, we have all said something like this at some point in our DFS “careers”, but these guys do it… All. The. Time. They are one player away, in every tournament, for every sport, every night!

7. Mr. “Thoughts”

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The infamous one-word question, “Thoughts?”

Mr. Thoughts is the guy that posts a lineup that looks like he built it while waiting for Starbucks to make his drink. You can tell by looking at it that he did zero research, and he posts it in a group chat or Facebook group with the one-word tagline, “thoughts”? This prompts everyone in the said group or chat to comment on his lineup and tell who he should play over the guys he has. In the end, they basically end up building his lineup for him. This is the lazy man’s way to do research.

Again, don’t get me wrong. We have all done this before, but we are legitimately looking for advice. We did our research and built what we think is a solid lineup. You can usually tell when you have a “Thoughts” guy on your hands when he posts is edited lineup six-to-seven times with the words, “how about this?”, “what if I did this?”, or my favorite, “how does it look now?”.

6. The Complainer

This guy takes the fun out of daily fantasy. He “quits” every night. He complains about every player in his lineup not hitting value. He claims the game is unfair because the sharks have a big advantage by maxing out every tournament. Then he wins something, and suddenly he is the expert, telling everyone his new “strategy” on how to win consistently. He comments on every “Thoughts” lineup, and then, when his advice turns out to be terrible, he goes right back to complaining.

5. The Sneaky Guy

I’m sure you have heard this phrase before, “Player so-and-so could be sneaky today”. There is nothing wrong with saying this when you truly believe a guy is “sneaky”. The guys I’m talking about, however, mention everyone under the price of $5,000 as sneaky, and when one of them pans out, he makes sure everyone knows he called him out hours before lock. He thinks no one else remembers the other 12 guys he also called sneaky that did not pan out, so he screen shots his one correct call-out and posts it all over social media.

4. The Regreter

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“Why didn’t I play this lineup in a tournament?”

The Regreter is a guy we almost feel bad for. This is the guy that played a lineup in a $1 50/50 or a free league, but not in a GPP, and of course, his lineup goes off for 398 points and could have won him a ton of money. He posts the infamous, “How much would this have won in a $5 GPP?”. I said we almost feel bad for him because he does it all the time. It’s like clock-work. Every time I check one of my Facebook groups, I see the same guy asking, “How much would this have made…”.

3. The One-Minute-Man

Missy Elliot made the on-minute-man famous. The guys that blow their wad way too soon. We know these guys in daily fantasy as the guys that post their lineup five minutes after lock and their up $800 and they say, “Hope this holds!”. They famously stack the early game on the slate just so they can see their lineups at the top of the leaderboards. In the words of Missy Elliot, “We don’t need no minute men”.

2. The Lineup Stalker

This guy is the older cousin to the “Thoughts” guy. He doesn’t even waste time building a lineup. He simply joins all the DFS Facebook groups and just waits for everyone else to post their lineups. These guys rarely comment on anything, they just lurk in the background waiting for the perfect lineup to steal and plug into a few tournaments. To add insult to injury, he will inexplicably end up in your contest and you’ll have to split your winnings with him.

1. The Lineup Providers

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Can’t believe I actually had to post that on Twitter for the sake of this article.

They are the absolute bane of daily fantasy. I’m sure there are some legitimate providers out there, but the mass of bad ones all over Twitter, give all Lineup Providers a bad name. You can usually spot these guys by their overuse of the flame emoji and their excessive use of the word Bro or Bruh. They all have the dreaded “Auto DM” set up on Twitter, and they claim 75 percent win percentages. Let me get this straight. You win 75 percent of the time and you’re on Twitter begging for tips? Wow, sounds legit, where do I sign up?

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