This will hurt your feelings
I’m about to kick you in the axioms
In the quote above, Mencken was talking about — guess who — you!
To begin with, I’m going to kick you where it hurts —your core beliefs.
Get this though your skull — It’s not the world, it’s YOU!
It is a noxious aspect of human nature — and especially in the current cultural ethos in the West — to always shift any blame outside ourselves. It’s either the government, that detestable political party, those clueless neighbors of yours, the friends gossiping behind your back, the weather, luck, the mailman, the dog, your spouse, your children, your parents, your job, the economy — anything but you. If you’re the kind of person who reflexively shouts out “BUT THAT’S VICTIM BLAMING”, your reaction is a symptom of exactly the problem I’m talking about and you need to read this article more than anyone else.
The sheltered and reflexive worldview
It’s a downward spiral, a feedback loop — the more you blame everyone and everything but yourself, the weaker you become and the more the world seems unbearable. You build a castle to shelter yourself from everything that bothers you, but life has a tendency to always break though such flimsy constructions. And what do you do then? Build more walls, become weaker and more fragile and lash out louder or slither away even deeper into the prison of your own making. Worst of all, you think that somehow makes you a good person, morally miles above stoic emotionless monsters or those trying to improve their lives.
No, you’re far worse — for yourself and for others. A constant generator of negative emotion, in constant need of attention and care by people who could be doing productive and fulfilling tasks with their time instead. You use the good intentions of people around you as a noose around their necks. You create nothing, but suffering and ceaseless drama, you feast upon generosity and altruism. You are hard on the journey towards your personal Hell and you’d be damned if you didn’t drag as many people down with you as possible.
As for those of you, who believe you truly are innocent and pure victims, playing out your spectacle of emotional extortion upon the people closest to you, something along those lines is probably going though your mind:
I just want people to notice my pain. I need shelter, protection and love. I deserve that for all my suffering. My pain makes me a good person and your harsh words are very hurtful. You don’t know what it’s like to be me! The world doesn’t understand me, people don’t understand me, everything is dangerous — someone, please hold me tight!
Let me give you some advice you never asked for — you are the chief architect of your suffering, you are the expert torturer in this narrative, you’re the damn Spanish Inquisition to your own better self. That didn’t sound much like advice, did it? Admitting that you played a causal part in your whole spectacle of misery is the first step towards digging yourself out of that pit.
That sounds absolutely abysmal, doesn’t it? That’s because you know exactly what I’m talking about and what’s worse — or better, depending on how mature you are — you know the antidote to such a miserable existence.
Taking responsibility for you own life
Just try it — it stings at first, but things begin to make sense in a new light after a while. If you say there’s no meaning to life, then the only meaning you have is pain. Taking responsibility for your actions and choices is inherently meaningful, though difficult — you will be in constant combat with your self-destructive tendencies.
Hopefully, this was a much needed kick in the axioms to get you moving in a positive direction in life — and you’re the one who gets to define that direction, so get going!