I laughed, I cried, I cried laughing!
12 steps… my two are grown and flown (31, 26) …. do the math about what parenting trends were popular then… I conformed to none of that. I kinda feel like I was parenting all wrong but they are both wicked smart, independent young adults so meh….
Bedtime? I can’t really recall a bedtime “routine,” because I don’t think we ever established one. We prepped our kids to always be prepared to bug out at any moment, day or night. A routine puts them in a comfort zone and away from preparedness. In exchange, they learned how to bathe standing up with a washcloth and a bucket of cold water, to brush their teeth with their finger and learned the Sears Roebuck catalog paper can be softened if you crumple it up enough times.
Catsup is a vegetable and socks, underwear can be turned inside out for maximum wear. You can use the stars to find your way home. Two dimes and a nickel are more valuable than a single quarter. I could drop my kids into anywhere on this planet and they would survive.
Just kidding. Don’t send out the law. Anyway, we’re past the statute of limitations. Besides, they won’t make trouble; I got photos.*
*Sure, they are photos of happy, well-adjusted kids doing things like jumping on a trampoline, hugging the dog, playing with friends, having birthday parties, etc but these are just the kind of images these two do not need their friends seeing. They both got street-cred badass reps to protect.