I am inclined more and more to get behind this idea of hipster-douche Kirk.
Oliver “Shiny” Blakemore
94

The last rock concert I was at was the AC/DC Back in Black tour in Minneapolis. Nothing has been relevant since ;)

That’s actually not all that true. I mean, I was at the concert and I remember Angus whacking that big bell and .. could have been Brian… or maybe Malcolm… maybe just a random roadie, anyone here know? Where was I….

I remember Hells Bells and Highway to Hell… I have a tshirt somewhere but maybe that is at the Goodwill by now … I do remember not remembering where I parked my car, a jet black ’74 Javelin AMX 440 so it’s not like it looked like every other car in the lot, still when you may or may not have been stoned out of your gourd and you’re with three of your best mates and maybe there was a random girl who wanted me to stay with her and inspect her tshirt, y’know, make sure it wasn’t counterfeit and all…. a little off the beaten path, while we waited for the parking lot to clear so we could find the car… and come down a bit … maybe we needed to do that and damn she was hot… so I wasn’t really looking for the car all that much when I had two perfectly good headlights right here waiting for the lot to clear… my friends found the car on the other side of the area, there were four lots on the square building, they tore that thing down years ago to build the Mall of America… couldn’t really hear straight for like two weeks and never did see that girl again, even though she said she would meet up at Mickey’s on Snelling next Wednesday when I was at work across the street at the Viking Village…. life, eh?

I have no idea where I was going with this Oliver Shiny but I guess I’m saying the last relevant band was AC/DC.