The fight is over —

I used to be in love with the idea of you

What more can a naive, brokenhearted girl even want more

Than a person everyone wants to have

Long hair, fragile eyes

Soft voice, fragile ego

Gentle smile, hardened heart

I could only ever look at you from miles away and hope

That maybe one day we’ll see each other again

Short hair, same eyes

Sharper voice, hardened ego

Yet a gentle smile, and a slightly softened heart

I look at you from across the table as you reach out for my hand and I wonder if my confessions are taken seriously

Do you know how much it took out of me when I went home?

And yet, it’s been a year of my mind creating scenarios, I’ve fallen in and out of love, I’ve destroyed and recreated myself over and over again, I’ve cried over so many things, and yet one thing remains the same — I am still in love with the idea of you.

What more can a lonely girl even want more than a lonely boy whose heart will always belong to another?

No matter how much you have changed or remained the same, I still long to talk to you.

I do not know you, but I always wished I did

i always wished I knew how to piece together these little puzzles you give

But I am done fighting myself and beating myself up for not being able to solve it

— I am done running after you.

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