…lf knew not to say anything, but the ego attacked anyway in an attempt to protect the relationship. Ironically, the way we choose to armor ourselves is often precisely the way we lose what we are trying to protect. Luckily, my boyfriend remained calm and patient throughout my tirade. He gave me a kiss and a hug, …
During the worst year of my life, I fought a battle with my mind that seemed as if it was never going to end. My head was like a snow globe that had been shaken; and thoughts were like the flakes inside, chaotic and endless. Eventually, the snow stopped; I gained my sanity back and started sleeping through the night again.
I reacted strongly to people being mad at me — it felt like annihilation — so I learned how to read the subtle micro-expressions on people’s faces and tried my best to deflect anger, which meant figuring out what people wanted from me and then doing exactly that.
I took it all in — anger, fear, frustration, weariness — but wasn’t equipped yet to sort out the emotions I took on. My gut was tuned to seek harmony and peace, and environments that didn’t vibrate on that frequency I tried to clean up and make better.
You can be as creative as you want if you allow yourself enough time, focus and commitment to master what drives you or makes you come alive. Unfortunately many people have chosen to deny us their gifts because they lack confidence and are too critical of themselves. They can’t help but worry about everything wrong with what they intend to launch, start, do or create.