A short tale For the Kosher traveler

I read online that Montreal Qc has the best Kosher restaurants in the world with a specialty in smoked meats. So I did an online search for the best restaurant. Turns out that the day I could go was a time that Jews do not eat meat and for tisha b’ av.

Nevertheless, my Slovenian friend Tanja who never met a Jew before, wanted to eat there. I thought: well, they probably have fish or something, and fish here in Canada is pretty good.

So we walk and walk — I mean a lot — because we got a bit lost. I asked for directions from a lady who happens to be an owner of another restaurant that is still closed. She says, go ahead if we want a long line. My friend Tanja is upset by the comment, but needless to say, when we finally get there, we see a long line. I ask Tanja, are you sure you want to go? She says yes, and after 10 minutes in line, I ask her the same question again, and she says yes.

So we finally get in and sit down. I ask our waiter if they have fish. They say no. I look at the menu and see Poutin. Poutin is a Canadian dish of fries with gravy and cheese. I ask “What is it made of?” “Cheese and gravy” “ You mean fake cheese?” “ No real cheese” “But wait, how is it that you have cheese in a restaurant with meat products”. “It is not a kosher restaurant.” So I ask “what do you have that’s vegetarian?” “Nothing”.

I look at the menu and get coleslaw which looks vegetarian and since it is the type that does not even have mayonnaise but a sweet syrup. When I am done, I try to pay but I use the wrong card and before I can get another card. The owner who I was talking to before, looks at me with compassion and says, “ is on the house”. When we walk out, Tanja asks, “ the waiter was cute, is that a Jewish guy?” I say “ I do not know” The short of it is always double-check if a restaurant is kosher, even if very famous and people can be really nice :)

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