Sealson 5 Power Rankings
We are now most of the way through the season. Teams have had plenty of time to show what they are worth so I figured it was time to do some rank ‘em.
The best and brightest of Season 15 PST poised for a Grand finals run.
LeoJ: The man of the season, Leoj. This Tswift based team is just chock full of value players with Div 4 champion stand in, Bury, PST veteran, Zend (aka Indifferent) as well as “legend players,” Leoj and Richie. Combine all this with a healthy serving of superior ashmore and it is no surprise that these guys are solidly first place in the group stage.
Anbokr: Big bad brownbokr is here, fully sandbagged and accompanied by his equally sandbagged brothers, Pressure and BMTS. There is not a trio even remotely comparable to this monster squad. A close, but lost series against Leoj may have lowered their spot on the standings page, but it has not lowered their place in the hearts of the hardcore PST-Sun fans.
Ultra: The cutest nazi youth in Canada struck some real luck this season when he managed to snag the literal reincarnation of Hitler in the first round of draft. This aryan super squad is the kind of traditional top heavy team I feel like I used to see have more success in previous RD2L seasons but currently only one such team is in this tier. The skill doesn’t run as deep as the other top rosters but Tree and Ultra make up for it with their powerful 2–3 punch.
Redground: When looking at this team you might ask yourself, “how did a high divine player manage to pick an immortal?” But that is irrelevant. The true power of this team comes from the cosmic mind energy that was released with the fusion of Katiethrees’ galaxy brain and Redground’s redtard brain. Never before has a soul altering aura of brilliance and geniueses empowered an RD2L team and it may never happen again.
Hamingzy: It’s everybody's favorite rulebooker, Mike, and his squad is absolutely popping this season. When I saw Mike’s final roster on draft day I thought to myself, “he’s done the same thing I did, but better.” And I was right. Literally every player on this team is good for their medal and the roles work out perfectly. The tiebreaker score looks monkas but a 2–0 win against Ultra is enough for me to call them top tier. 10/10 would not adjust HZ down again.
Teams I expect to make playoffs, but unlikely to go all the way.
Doomcow33: Doomteam33 already has a 9–3 record, which means they could make playoffs without winning another game. Regardless of their score, I’m reluctant to place them higher up until they can win against a team already in that tier, or stop losing games to teams in this one.
SSD: Frostbite? more like SANDBAG. All it takes is one filthy 60% winrate league convert to take a team like SSD’s from middling, to top tier. The other members are decent but Frostbite MVP. Frostbite Frostbite! F R O S T B I T E
Luke: As shown last season, Luke can carry literally anything. I’m not sure this team is much more skilled than his previous one but at least he actually likes them and wants to show up on Sunday. Their tiebreaker score is pretty good, but unless they manage to 2–0 a decent team I’m no convinced they are top tier.
Skaterx7: I am OG Skater fan and I will remain Skater fan. Playing greedy is a common and well known strategy for high mmr players to succeed in RD2L, but when people talk about Skater they call him greedy as an insult? Real confusing stuff. His first pick seems to have worked out pretty well, Fatsloth has a super cute avatar and chills in the discord a lot which is a great sign. Cookies is also pretty good in my humble opinion.
Benbird: I know nothing about this team but I still have PTSD from Ploopy so they get respect. Kizu owns.
Clare❤️Teresa: Really putting yourself this high? Yeeeeh I am. If I wasn’t so high up the scoreboard I would play truck and execute him for heresy :dab:
The true middling teams
Death’s Head: These guys only accomplishment is taking a game off of Darkou and I’m pretty sure that team is overrated. The fact they already have 7 wins means playoffs is very possible and I can’t bring myself put them any lower even though I kind of want to. The amount of luck this team has had is actually baffling. They got a 2–0 from an early BYE, 2–0ed a disbanded team, then got to play Shea Dr. last week, whose team is dumpster tier. In b4 they 2–0 me lol!
Burrahobbit: Inquisitor has one win this season, and it was against Burrahobbit. I am slightly biased here, since we scrimmed them, which doesn’t necessarily mean anything, but I don’t think Columbus’ lads are too hot.
Mango Wango: Andkid is a thot dancing silk god, and now that Bloodninja is out of the way and Rif is here to stay, Mang Wango and the crew might just pull themselves into playoffs. Unfortunately this team has a flat 50% winrate with a low tiebreaker so merely tying their final 2 series won't be enough.
bsvshbjhvsjsbhjjsv: This is a just a shitty version of Ultra’s team. All the cool teams have a full roster of decent players but these are guys are super top heavy. Player draft went downhill pretty fast after the Jakou pick.
Polo: Another top heavy team. Polo himself stops this team from being bad but the pos 3–5 look somewhat mediocre. With a great tie breaker score this team could definitely make it to playoffs as long as they keep at least tying their series.
MJJ: The fact this team hasn’t simultaneously exploded and imploded is a success in itself. Good job Michael J Dad. To repeat what has been said many times already, I think this team has the potential to be good but is too inconsistent and wild to make the long run.
Waifu: First pick Gskw was a big gamble, unfortunately the pay off, is not looking fantastic. This team is definitely ok, they have 1–1ed fellow mid tier teams, 2–0 Danny and got 2–0ed by Leoj. Gonna have to pull off some real anime, get stronger every fight bullshit to get the 3 wins they need to get to playoffs (assuming a similar amount of required wins to last season).
Nothing too special, any of these teams could make playoffs, but most won’t.
Glotch: 4 Divines…this is a legit 4 Divine team…kinda like Ploopy’s team but fucking garbage. Seriously in awe of how, A. this teams top 4 players are Divine 3 average, and B. are still losing most of their games.
Matieu: Mat did his usual friend picking and since he does that every season I have never played with half of these guys. The matchups Mat got were kind of weird. They 2–0ed a couple of bad teams then got shot up the leaderboard to lose 0–2 to some very good teams. Might actually be grey tier worthy but I’m no sure cause they haven’t played other grey tier teams.
Healthy Snacks: Potato baby, I’m so sorry your role got dumpstered. If you somehow make it to playoffs I’m sure you will own on the new patch. This squad actually looks like the kind of team with the potential to do well but things just aren’t working out this season, or the players aren’t value.
Crap: Two immortals sounds nice, but CRAP’s team had a real rough start. Recent wins might indicate these old men are finally revved up and ready to go, but I wouldn’t hold my breath on them making playoffs. For the record, I’m not actually sure how many teams make playoffs so I‘ve’ just talking out of my ass the whole time.
Ripley: Truck LOL! Team is TRASHSHSHHSHSH
Frosty Chee: 3rd round deadprez, very powerful. We are lucky Frosty is too chill to go all out or this team would be 12–0.
Brie: I had a lot of hope for this team when I first saw it, but it wasn’t meant to be. Even with smurfonquack this team is just going even against meh opponents.
These guys are too busy getting laid and being chads to win dota.
Pastafarian: Remember how I said HZ had the same draft idea that I did, but executed it better? Similarly, I thought Pasta had done the same thing, but worse, and I was right. If you remove the BYE and forfeits this team has won only a single game. Unlike Treyn and Mekia whose MMR is not necessarily accurate due to a lack of solo queue games, Rod’s consistent mid only, ranked grinding is a clear indication he plays only to his medal. In combination with double crusader last picks and lack of playmakers this team strikes me as just being a big misdraft by a captain who is new to the PST scene.
Torn: Only team to disband so far, R.I.P. At least I get Saiburs cooking photos now.
KingKraze: Ya’ll have seen the clip, this team is fucked up. Skill wise, I see no issues but, as most everyone expected, the personalities clashed in nuclear fashion.
Logical: Can’t expect much else from a team that is captained by a dog. Puppers are very cute, but have no opposable thumbs. In seriousness, I do not understand how this team is performing so poorly with two decent divines and late value picks. Maybe Logical actually does play worse on USW.
Kstigs: A 3–1 start including a win against Ultra gave me high hopes for this EST squad. Unfortunately, as the group stage went on the losses began piling up to the point where I’m not sure it’s even possible for them to make playoffs any more. I wish these fine lads the best of luck next season.
Danny: The no ancient strat had me genuinely curious of how these fellas would perform. The answer was: badly. Which is a shame cause it looked like a fun concept. At least sex addict, Vieheuhrbits can get back to fucking before Christmas.
Shea Dr: Shea trying to bring back old teams, but the future is now old man. People get called washed up all the time but this team really is!
Inquisitor: Sometimes players can get a little caught up on draft day calling teams “LITERALLY THE WORST/BEST IN THE DIVISION” and then it turns out people were wrong but with this team the predictions were correct. probably the worst possible 3 sequential picks I have ever seen.
Til next time,