Hi Quiet Luxury, Try Harder

4 min readJan 4, 2024

You’re not so Quiet, in fact you can leave and close the door behind you if you wish. We finally might have some peace.

I need Quiet Luxury to stop thinking it’s cool. And since I’ve decided to be a fixture at Harrods lately, having even gone grocery shopping there for the sake of it (the eggs & cheeses are rather good), women dressed in head-to-toe Loro Piana and Brunello Cuccinelli sets are everywhere… it’s actually slightly nauseating.

But it seems as if most people are with me on this one. I may be called a Sloan Ranger by some, but that doesn’t mean I’m about to start dressing in a 35,000£ coat with the matching everything that doesn’t even suit the weather. A teensy logo isn’t going to kill me, nor anyone else. In fact, Sophia Richie, the queen of the quiet luxury trend, isn’t quite so quiet at all. Her outfits are very obviously Chanel all over, the branding is there after all. The fact that we all took it so seriously at the start of its exponential growth to be commonly spoken of shows that it wasn’t ever quiet. We know your suit is Berluti, especially if you refuse to cut off that tag on your cuff 🤦🏻‍♀️.

Link : First rule to suit etiquette, rip off the tags and the white threads

So let’s call it out, dust it down, and give it a talking to. Logos are out, logo mania isn’t chic anymore, but quiet luxury amongst us fashion lovers, is all about a cheap flex. The characters in Succession aren’t quiet. They’re begging to be stared at, to receive more attention for their accomplishments by dressing the part. No one will mistake them for wearing a Zara suit, and that ludicrously capacious bag isn’t ludicrous, just really last season (the one worn on the show is on sale!). The character who took the time to spot it out as a means of denigrating his colleague is more ludicrous than the bag (I have no idea what the show is about tbh). Quiet luxury should have more manners if it wanted to stay.

That said, I believe all of us are ready to drop kick it into another dimension because of the way it took over every magazine, every fashion publication, and still does at this very moment for a select set of people (and it isn’t the .1%). If you’re so nouveau that you have to flex in the newest way the internet has deemed worthy, you’ve missed the point.

My advice? Buy less, don’t buy fast fashion, tailor your clothing, dress for your shape, pick your colours (more on this another time), and have the confidence to eschew the trends that come your way. If you’re spending 100k to follow a trend; you’re

A. Technically behind or at the climax of the trend (As quiet luxury has been since June of last year).

B. Wasting time wearing something that probably doesn’t even suit you the way you really want it to.

Those clothes will one day sit in a sad shop or in some landfill, or worse yet, gather dust in your closet. I suggest finding something more… empowering. Find your style, rather than allowing TikTok to tell you what it is.

Just because I’m a huge hater, it doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate a trend. Let me give you some alternatives that fit the “money” vibe, based on my dogmas above:

The Coastal Grandma