The worst thing she can say is NO!
No buddy, if she said no, you are blessed!
Have you ever fallen in love? If so, where did it all start? Why did you fall in love with a certain person in your life? What made them special? How did you meet her? These are the questions I ponder with myself. What made you attracted to that one person? Is it the way they speak or the way they smile? Her eyes were so pretty like a drawing. I loved to draw her eyes. So, was it her eyes that did the magic for me? Well, I will never know.
When did I actually fall for her? What made me crush so bad for her? Ever thought about such things about your beautiful relationship? We all long for a soul mate. And when the time is right, you stumble upon that special person in your life. You feel magical around that person. You want them forever in your life. And you want them to know that they mean life to you. But you don’t have the courage to do so. We've all been there, right?
The one who gives us butterflies under our stomach is also the one who gives us chills down our spine. That’s how love works. You are scared of losing them because you messed things up. So, you being a 'scaredy cat' is justifiable. Don’t worry; we all are like that irrespective of gender, sex, color, or borders. It’s a universal thing. Love is indeed scary!
So you approach your close friends for a 'confidence boost' and 'imaginary support'. And then they all cheer you up and give you confidence. They say, “Go on, buddy, all she can say is no. Go ask her out.” Now, while saying this, they have this notion of believing that the most negative outcome of proposing somebody is a denial or rejection. But trust me when I say this, it’s not.
You know what’s more frightening? It is them saying nothing. Yes, you read it right. Nothing! Some are lucky to be said “yes, I love you too, and I want to be with you too forever!” to their face. And for some others, it's just a “let's just be friends for now” quote. But you don’t have a slight idea of how lucky you are if the woman you chose had the guts to say either of these lines!
Nothing breaks somebody other than uncertainty. And it’s not a sudden process! If you are rejected in a proposal, it’s more like boom! And over. That’s it. I’m not saying it won’t hurt. It will hurt. But it stops there. But when she or he doesn’t say anything while you proposed, then you may start to feel the turmoil. Overthinking takes the stage.
“She loves me hence didn’t reject me”. “She doesn’t love me, hence she didn’t say yes to me”. These are the thoughts that play tug of war in your poor brain. The formation of a situationship is a vile outcome of such abnormal proposals. And it will eat you alive. Trust me, I have been through it in my life. And it was the worst years of my life. You lose yourself. You lose confidence and the ability to be genuinely happy.
You start to question your character and ethics. It’s like someone crushing you and taking your pieces every day, one by one. And what’s more painful is that each time you can feel all this. The one you respected the most and wanted to spend your entire life with became the cause of your turmoil. The uncertainty was a curse. It was like taking a fish out of water and making it suffocate almost to death and putting it back in the tank.
Imagine going through this each day for years. I prefer a hard ‘no' to my face rather than going through this torture again in my life. In fact, even in my so-called relationship, I have wondered so many times. Why didn’t she just clearly say no to my face when she could have? Why drag it this much when she clearly didn’t want me?
I think that will be a mystery forever, and I don’t want to know it anymore. Honestly, I’m done with all those ponderings in my thoughts. I prefer to know whether aliens have 10 fingers or not now! Nevertheless, I can say confidently now that being said no in a proposal is not the worst thing you can go through in a relationship!
If a girl or boy rejected you, be happy. They actually cared about you and themselves. They didn’t want you to waste your precious time on them for a lost cause. They were brave to tell you this on your face. So now it’s your turn to be brave. Move on and focus on building your life. And once you ace this, the rest will follow. If anybody is feeling sad, I’m here for you. This is not the end.
I hope you guys enjoyed reading my post. If you do please leave 50 claps. Thank you for reading.
നന്ദി 🫴🕊️
