Remote Year Reflections

Jessica Goldman
Sep 1, 2018 · 3 min read

Early 2018 feels like an eternity ago. Just a few months ago I was in denial. Denial that I was in a job that wasn’t a good fit. Denial that I was even in the right career. Denial that I was even happy with the way my life was going. It took a drastic decision to quit my job, put my shit in storage and go do a thing that involved joining a random group of 30 strangers on a four month trip around Europe.

It was a tumultuous four months with several ups and downs, and hands down the best decision I could have made. I did some crazy stuff, like zip-lining higher than I ever have before, cliff jumping in the Adriatic sea, skinny dipping (in multiple seas), trying new food, going to Running of the Bulls, traveling solo, riding a bike, road tripping, taking public transit, staying up until sunrise, surviving many many bug bites and overall doing it with a stellar group of people.

Was it the most perfect four months ever? Of course not. Mistakes were made and tears were shed. There are things I would have done differently and I try to reflect with no regrets, but that isn’t always easy. Do I wish I was able to push past my anxiety and open up more to people? Push my boundaries a bit more? Sure. But only so much can happen in four months. The best thing I can do is give myself as much slack as possible. I did a lot and tried my best and I can only keep going forward from here.

If anything, two words best describe this experience: transformative and perspective.

When I chose to quit my job back in mid-March, it felt like the hardest decision I’d ever made. Having career doubts and life doubts stressed me out so much I started going to some (much needed) therapy to get my mind straight. What did I want? What was going to be best for me? Why is my anxiety through the roof?! We are so trained to believe we need to have this “linear” life, where we pick a career and move up steadily until we retire. Have a stable income. Blah blah blah. Breaking from that was SO hard for me — I truthfully didn’t believe leaving that lifestyle was something I could do. But I knew something wasn’t right and I needed a break. Accepting that I could do it was a huge turning point for me and I’m so grateful I did it. This experience was essential; it provided just what I needed at just the right time. I came out of it feeling just a bit stronger and just a bit wiser. Four months wasn’t even enough, I 100% want to keep going.

I chose to not just “sabbatical,” but freelance in order to make some income. I didn’t know if I wanted to make it my career or not, I just knew it was some money coming in. As someone who constantly feels like they need to be working, it was hard AF to take a step back. It was stressful at times not feeling like I had enough to do, experiencing guilt for sitting on a beach versus working a full 8-hour workday. It was hard watching people in my group work 40+ hour work weeks doing a job they love in order to explore the world. I had to constantly remind myself that I was on my own path and it was OK, that not only did I deserve this, I needed this.

I’m also incredibly grateful and surprised that after these four months I actually know where I want to go from here. I decided to move into the UI/UX field — it perfectly blends my passion for creating with my interest in understanding the human psyche. I actually feel relaxed and confident when I think about what’s ahead, and I’ve never felt that before.

All in all, I’m incredibly grateful I chose to do what I did. I traveled to some amazing places with a group of 30 like-minded people, and how many people can say they got to do that? Whether we want to admit it or not, we were are going through something that led us to do this unique thing. And strangers coming together for a unique experience like Remote Year can be a beautiful, scary and wild ride that I highly recommend hopping on.

Jessica Goldman

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product designer @ omaze www.goldmanjessica.com